Aug/02
2017

I love it when tRumps admit their own stupidity. Bonus points for claiming it as a defense!

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump's son-in-law told a group of congressional interns that the Trump campaign couldn't have colluded with Russia because the team was too dysfunctional and disorganized to coordinate with a foreign government.

The remarks on Monday by Jared Kushner, a senior adviser to the president, came in response to a question about Special Counsel Robert Mueller's investigation into Russia's meddling in the 2016 election and whether the Trump campaign worked with Moscow.

ForeignPolicy.com first reported Kushner's remarks, which were intended to be off the record. "They thought we colluded, but we couldn't even collude with our local offices," Kushner said, according to the website.

Pure hilarity right? No not really. Last I checked, being ignorant wasn't a valid excuse when committing a crime. Even when it comes from a tRump.

Aug/01
2017

Guuuns = Smuuurt

So... where did she have it hidden?

Kate Elizabeth Prichard, 25, was still in her bridal gown when she was detained at a motel in Murfreesboro.

She allegedly drew the 9mm handgun, put it to her husband's head and pulled the trigger.

The gun was not loaded, but she later allegedly loaded it and fired into the air, causing onlookers to flee.(BBC)

Yep, it's rootin' tootin' Tennessee and the bimbos got pistols packed in their cleavage. Because guns are great! Next to godliness! They'll have to kill her before they take her guns away! (Insert more meaningless, pro-gun rhetoric here.)

At least he found out before it was too late. Really, really too late. One word for ya bro: annulment.

Aug/01
2017

Scarlet 'A' For Alabama

Bitches in Alabama ain't got no fucking rights. Not if legislature has their way. Whores who get knocked up are gonna have those babies, because the state demands it.

A judge has rejected an Alabama law that puts teenage girls seeking abortions through a court-like process with a lawyer representing the foetus.[..] Since 1987, girls aged under 18 in the state must get permission from her parents before she can get an abortion, but a judicial bypass was available if the girl could show her mental maturity in cases which involved abuse.

The legislation in 2014 mean parents or a legal guardian could appeal against the judicial bypass, thereby delaying the procedure until the girl could no longer seek an abortion.[..]

The girl was 13 weeks pregnant when she appeared before a family court judge, records show.

A judge granted the abortion on 27 June and a district attorney appealed against the decision the same day. (BBC)

Like that? Criminals won't get free legal representation but a non-human mass of cells sure can. And the DA himself none the less. In tRump-merica women will be subjected to the most physically and emotionally intrusive punishments for the crime of having a womb. Rape, incest, doesn't fucking matter, a woman's body isn't just public property, her fate, her future is subject to the whims of a patriarchal, repressive, religious fundamentalism which dictates that ALL women are the source of evil and as such need to be controlled for the good of society.

Or, if you prefer the short hand, Alabama is fucking EVIL and it's lawmakers are women-hating filth.

Enslaving women through forced-pregnancy is a third world mentality, lovingly embraced by third world states like Alabama in the name of "protecting" women by ruining their future and ensuring that they can never get ahead.

Fuck you Alabama. Fucking, fuck you.

Jul/31
2017

And another one rides the bus...

WASHINGTON (AP) -- Firmly taking charge in an unruly White House, former Gen. John Kelly moved in Monday as President Donald Trump's new chief of staff and immediately made sure that Trump's profanity-spouting new communications director was shown the door, ignominiously ousted after less than two weeks on the job.

I mean maybe it really DOESN'T count as being fired because technically he never really STARTED the job? Maybe that's Dickhead's new policy? Hire then fire them before they can collect a paycheck?

Dickhead was quoted as saying his administration was "running smoothly". For what? Rome in the age of Nero? I'm pretty certain even Caligula would be impressed at this point...

Jul/30
2017

Dickhead didn't get what he wanted: something considered a "win". So what's his next, thoughtful, well-consoled step?

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump on Saturday threatened once more to end required payments to insurance companies unless lawmakers repeal and replace the Obama-era health care law.

I'm unclear what he's upset about, I mean it's not like he actually DID anything to help sway the vote. Get out and talk to people? Gather insurance companies and the public together for discussion? Create charts based on ACTUAL data that show where the ACA is lacking and why something else needs to be done?

Fuck no man, because that's hard work. And tRump don't do no fucking work. Work is for losers. And losers who don't deliver get badmouthed and then fired. Or quit. So far Dickhead has managed to eliminate more than one person a month, and this doesn't count all the people he's publicly threatened. That doubles the number.

Dickhead can't manage. He can hire good people who, for a time, can actually get things done until Dickhead gets tired of their advice, or bored and then he just makes their life so miserable that they quit. As a result the Whitehouse is a seething mess of hatred, backstabbing and vitriol the likes of which would make Lady MacBeth throw herself on her knife without a second thought.

So here we are, full tilt into the first year and Dickhead's only solution to solving the vacuum left by his lack of leadership is more firings and more threats. The only practical solution of which is for Congress to work harder to marginalize the powers he's got. The next person who winds up in office is going to be behind the eightball because the office of the president will be severely nerfed, a figurehead with even smaller authority than Her Royal Battleship, Ms. Elisabeth II.

Dickhead didn't so much ruin the job as he did change the balance of power, from three branches to two. This is why we can't have nice things.

Jul/29
2017

Trump to police: 'Don't be too nice'

It's not Russia you stupid Dickhead.

Jul/29
2017

So there we go, 3 GOP senators with real balls (so to speak since two were women) to decline to enact a complete shitshow on the American public and 48 complete pussies who voted yes ONLY because they knew it wouldn't pass.

So how's that "repeal the ACA" workin' out for ya? Not so good huh? You were all big talk about what you WOULD do if you were in charge there, GOP ol' buddy, but it was sooo fucking easy to say no. So easy to impede, obstruct, prevent, interfere that you never once, not for a single fucking second, had a plan to make your promises a reality.

Pretty embarrassing huh? I know I'd be embarrassed for you if I wasn't so damn disgusted by the fact that so FEW of you have a spine or the abilities you claim you have to run the country.

Do your job? Nah, you don't even know how. Not even in a terrible way. Instead you're all so fucking busy covering your asses and sucking Dick that you can't govern.

So, now we know what the party of HATE and NO is really good for. Absolutely nothing... say it again.

Jul/28
2017

I love this quote regarding the GOP on their attempts to re-write or re-whatever the ACA...

That prompted Democratic Sen. Chris Murphy to tweet: "Seriously, this is weapons grade bonkers. 3 Senators just announced they will vote for repeal only if assured it will never become law. (AP)

So let me get this straight, the GOP senators merely want to go on RECORD as voting yes so they can SAY they did something, but they're totally against the results of what they're voting for.

Well, tRump sure brought the stupid to the GOP and it looks like they're pretty much stuck with it. Kinda like the taxpayers are being stuck with over a billion for the "wall".

Great job guys, great fucking job.

Jul/27
2017

Scaramouche defended his boss by saying "Dickhead's [sic] not elite... he's pizza and cheese burgers." I wasn't aware that eating those things disqualifies you from the title of "elite".

Because he loves to chow down on delicious pizza and hamburgers, President Donald Trump is certainly not a member of the “elite” and can relate to the common man. At least that’s what new White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci claimed to a befuddled and questioning BBC reporter. (Newsweek)

So message to the world's elite out there: Spit out that burger! Stick your nose in the air when your limo drives by a pizza joint! The Man Has Spoken and the rule is now that you're NOT allowed to eat those things much less ENJOY them!

On the other hand, if eating those things (in the White House, hand-made, to order, whenever and wherever you like, on fine china with expensive beverages) denotes that you're not elitist then what do we call the people who cook and serve those for a living?

Oh yeah. Immigrants.

Jul/26
2017

I support LBGT.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump abruptly declared a ban Wednesday on transgender troops serving anywhere in the U.S. military, catching the Pentagon flat-footed and unable to explain what it called Trump's "guidance." His proclamation, on Twitter rather than any formal announcement, drew bipartisan denunciations and threw currently serving transgender soldiers into limbo.

"Please be advised that the United States Government will not accept or allow Transgender individuals to serve in any capacity in the U.S. Military," the commander in chief tweeted.

Trump wrote that he had consulted with "my generals and military experts," but he did not mention Defense Secretary Jim Mattis, the retired Marine general who less than one month ago told the military service chiefs to spend another six months weighing the costs and benefits of allowing transgender individuals to enlist

Let's be clear:

  • Dickhead NEVER consulted with anyone, his statement is just another pathological lie
  • Trans troops exist, have existed and will continue to exist and do their job alongside their peers
  • "Hours of sensitivity training" as decried by shithead, religious fundies supports ALL non-white, non-male members of the armed forces and CONTINUES to be essential
  • Dickbag has the attention span of an amoeba and the intelligence of nearly the same, this is just another pretty distraction that caught his minuscule attention and aids NO one, except his freakshow followers

I do congratulate Dickhead in one area: consistency. He does manage to meet or exceed the WORST things imaginable. And many that are unimaginable too.

Jul/26
2017

Because it's pretty clear he doesn't know how to behave around kids. You gotta wonder who raised his?

Parents have expressed anger after President Donald Trump delivered a highly politicised speech to tens of thousands of boy scouts. (BBC)

Dickhead went to speak to the Boy Scouts, invited by someone, one Rex Tillerson, who should have known the fuck better. But no. Not everyone has woken up to the inept, pompous, self-aggrandizing egomaniac that is the current "elected" president. But quite a few have...

The pushback from Americans over the speech included members from both parties.

"I just don't think it was appropriate," said Rob Romalewski, a Republican and retired information-technology expert from suburban New Orleans who attained the rank of Eagle Scout as a teenager and has worked with the Boy Scouts all his adult life.

"It just doesn't seem like he was talking to the boys," Romalewski said. "He was more or less just using it as an excuse to babble on." (AP)

Babble is about all he's ever done, at speeches, on Twitter, during interviews. Dickhead doesn't do homework, he doesn't prepare, he just spouts off on whatever spark enters his pea brain. In this case he used an opportunity to speak to the next generation as a chance to stroke himself. Just another Pedo Politician showing how successful a shitbag can really be.

Jul/25
2017

So far the tRump administration seems to have established one firm policy: fire everyone.

GLEN JEAN, W.Va. (AP) -- President Donald Trump on Monday jokingly threatened during a speech to thousands of Boy Scouts to fire his health secretary if a crucial vote to repeal "Obamacare" fails.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump turned up the heat on Attorney General Jeff Sessions on Tuesday, launching a fresh Twitter tirade against him while musing privately about firing the man who was the first U.S. senator to endorse his candidacy.

Anthony Scaramucci, the Wall Street financier tapped for the role last week, said Tuesday that he was prepared to "fire everybody" to stop unauthorized information coming from the press office. (AP)

Remember the old joke "the beatings will continue until morale improves?" Well this takes it one step further "the executions will continue until something gets done."

Or not.

Jul/24
2017

This, THIS is why the GOP hates women, because they DESERVE to be hated. They're cunts, all of them. Evil. Devil spawn. And they must be repressed! For the good of the entire universe!

A Republican politician has blamed "female senators" for the spluttering efforts by his party to pass a healthcare bill.

Blake Farenthold, a congressman from Texas, told a local radio station if a man were responsible, he would challenge him to a duel. (BBC)

Yes Blake Fart-hold is PISSED. Those damn women! Having babies, not knowing their place, getting edumacated, and with tittes and shit. THOSE HOS! How dare they have an opinion. If they were men he'd fuck them, wait no, he'd FIGHT them (so easy to get those two things confused). Bitches? Can you believe! And it's their fault, wanting medical care for getting pregnant (they get pregnant just for a free trip to the city 'n all) and then wanting birth control to be covered by their employer? Fucking women are such a drain on the national economy, and screwing up the perfect world run by men, for men, one nation, under men with liberty and justice for men.

Goddamn those cunts. Blake sure knows what's good for them and NOTHING is good enough for them. Because Blake. Fart-hold. Has spoken.

Jul/23
2017

Bag Full Of Dicks

Dickhead's filled the White House with dicks. It's basically a bag full of dicks. And when one falls out he finds a bigger dick to cram into it.

White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer has quit, reportedly in protest at an organisational shake-up.

Mr Spicer stepped down because he was unhappy with President Donald Trump's appointment of a new communications director, according to reports.

Combative Wall Street financier Anthony Scaramucci has been picked for the role that Mr Spicer partially filled. (BBC)

President Bully is busy running through staff like they were sheets of toilet paper in a gas station lavatory. Threaten, fire, repeat. It's not even a year and people have come and went faster than any prior administration. Today it was Sean's turn. Fed up with the ass-dickery and piles of shit he had to defend ("covefe" had a secret meaning btw) he decided nothing was worth the amount of bullshit he had to endure and left.

Dickhead, unperturbed, has fisted another dick into the hole as quick as he could. And this guy is quite the prime shitstain.

In January 2017, the Wall Street bigwig was linked to the role of director for the Office of Public Liaison - where he would have managed the administration's engagement with the US business and political communities.

The job failed to materialise due to complications over the sale of his stake in SkyBridge, which meant it would take months for him to pass conflict-of-interest checks.

Basically it's the same story, Dickhead's complete disregard for the rest of the nation means nepotism, sycophants and assholery are the only qualifications needed to land a lucrative job in the White House. Because it's not about draining the swamp. It's about drowning the public in it, paving it over and building another hotel on top of the bodies.

Even the bodies of his former allies.

Jul/22
2017

Title brought to you by the Office of Redundancy Department.

A Florida man told police he "went bananas" after workers from a utility company parked their vehicles in front of his driveway while they carried out repair work. (BBC)

Florida. Guns. Assholes. These things add up to pure stupidity in its most refined form. Gunzerker was mad because a utility truck was in front of his driveway, but instead of using his words he just went out and shot the trucks. Because. This was WHILE the workmen were still trying to fix the issue that probably affected him as well.

His excuse? "He went bananas." Lovely. Lives are at risk and the only rationale is that a truck in front of your house makes you crazy.

Guns are bad. Fucking idiots with guns are lethal. Legality has nothing to do with it when people find it so easy to lose their temper and do asinine shit. It's not like you're going to overthrow anything with your damn guns anyway. All you're going to do is kill people because you went "bananas".

Jul/21
2017

Score one for the Italians, specifically the Milanese!

July 20 (UPI) -- Italian residents and tourists will be unable to enjoy selfie sticks, food trucks and glass bottles for the remainder of the summer.

Milan's town hall instituted a ban on selfie sticks and glass containers beginning July 14 to prevent litter and antisocial behavior during the summer months.

The ban, which also includes fireworks and firecrackers, prohibits visitors to the Darsena docklands area from "holding, carrying, leaving on the ground, disposing of, or receiving any kind of glass bottles or containers, cans, and selfie sticks."

Well done Milan. It's grand to see that at least one community is willing to tell tourists what most people already know: Don't be fucking crass-holes, be polite, stop taking pictures of yourself and LOOK at the place you came to visit. Memories are wonderful, why not try your own and see how that works? Also, not all pictures you take need to have YOU in them.

And while you're at it, pick up your shit. No one needs your damn pollution.

Jul/20
2017

Slavery and legal abortion? Both tragedies to the GOP. Except in the case of slavery it's not really that bad because slaves had it "better" back then. Women are trash who are less than slaves and only good beating and screwing. They have no place in politics, science or deciding their own future.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- The Senate has confirmed a Kentucky lawyer who equated abortion with slavery - calling them the "two greatest tragedies in our country" - to a lifetime appointment as a federal judge.

On a vote of 51-47, the Senate backed John Bush to serve on the Cincinnati-based 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals despite strong opposition from Democrats who said his blog posts under a pseudonym disqualified him.

Sen. Al Franken of Minnesota argued that Bush's writings made him "uniquely unqualified for the job."

But Bush was strongly supported by fellow Kentuckian Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, who lectured Franken on the Senate floor.

McConnell called Bush "a man of integrity and considerable ability" and said that Franken needed to "think a little harder" before describing Bush as out of bounds.

Actually Mitch, you shriveled, turkey-necked, dick-faced tool, Al wasn't out of line at all. Appointing a total fuckwad who avows to represent ONLY men, with ONLY contempt for women is NOT representative of qualified judiciary. That you would support someone who is as clearly misogynistic and biased to a lifetime role just demonstrates your complete lack of support for women.

GOP war on women? Yes. It's a thing. And Mitch is happy to be the standard bearer for the part that hates. Fuck you Mitch, fuck you and your tiny, shriveled, dick-brain.