Aug/12
2005

A word if you please

George Carlin once said "Words are all we have really". But he also was aware that not everyone likes all the words. Me? I like words. All of them. I try to pick my words to best express myself. Being a profane person, profanity is often a part of my vocabulary. Carlin's 'Seven Dirty Words' are part and parcel with me. Now, I don't go throwing them around for fun. I use my words to best describe my feelings, emotions, or ideas. If I call you a mother fucker, it's because I think you're a crappy person. I could call you a crappy person, but it doesn't have the same strength. But the thing is, even though one word is weaker than another, they are the same. Both of them demean the target in their own way. In much the same way, I could say "Son of a Gun" or "Son of a Bitch". They are interchangeable in intent. One of them has a force of will behind it, and the other is a weak imitation. Now, I watch my language when appropriate. For example, I try to avoid profanity when children are present and such things. Not because I don't think they should hear it, but because I'm not the parent and it's not my choice if they should hear it. However, some people get offended when I do display a force of will in my words. I have no problem call someone 'an assfaced, pig fucking, piss-covered whore with a mind like dogshit and a personality to match'. Not that I'm often forced to so that, but basically, I go no problem saying it. It amazes me when people tell me to watch my language. As if I was unaware of what I had just said. I mean, I had the thought, I retrieved the sounds associated with that thought, and I commanded my lungs and mouth to form the motions required to make the sound. It’s a very complex process. I don’t do it without knowing full well what I’m doing. And what exactly do they expect here? Let’s say I remove the ‘bad’ words from my words. Does that make their intent less? What if I call someone a son of a Babylonian Harlot”? Maybe not as vile sounding as Whore, but hey… you got the point, didn’t you? So why not say Whore? Everyone thought it. I meant it. Why not say what I mean. When I say fuck you, I mean fuck you. I don’t mean anything else nor do I want to say anything else. I mean fuck you. Pure and simple, fuck you. So next time you feel the need to ask me to watch my language, save yourself the trouble. I’m going to say ‘Fuck you’ again and you’re just going to get more offended. I think it’s all happier if you stay out of my words and worry about your own.
Aug/11
2005

Link: http://www.focusonyourchild.com/develop/art1/A0000684.html

There really aren't enough eye rolling emoticons in the world for this guy. His name is James Dobson and he wants to help you raise your child straight. Because anything else is hateful. He's a child psychologist who believes he has found many of the warning signs of your little boy's sexual orientation. He wants to tell you about them so you can... umm... do something about it. Probably something that will result in irrevocable damage to your relationship with your child and have them growing up hating you. But that's just my guess. I'm sure ass-wipe thinks you can change them and all. So, shall we examine these warning signs? Yes, let’s do that. 1. A strong feeling that they are “different” from other boys. Umm… check for me. 2. A tendency to cry easily, be less athletic, and dislike the roughhousing that other boys enjoy. Another check. Silly me. How dare I dislike baseball and wrestling. Me and those silly books I spent my childhood reading… we’ll be the ones over here making a lot of money. I’ll pay the rest of you to change my oil, k? 3. A persistent preference to play female roles in make-believe play. Ok, not me this time. 4. A strong preference to spend time in the company of girls and participate in their games and other pastimes. Big check here. At least up until high school, most of my friends were female. In children this is apparently gay. To the adult community it’s called trying to get laid. Go figure. 5. A susceptibility to be bullied by other boys, who may tease them unmercifully and call them “queer,” “fag” and “gay.” Another check here for me. Now, I hate to split hairs here, but… as I recall, children get called queer and fag long before most children know what the word even means. And generally the kids that get bullied are the smaller kids. Which would mean the problem here is the parents genetic code, right? 6. A tendency to walk, talk, dress and even “think” effeminately. Damn it. I knew my parents doomed me when they refused to buy me cutting edge fashions. Check. 7. A repeatedly stated desire to be — or insistence that he is — a girl. Ok, I’ll take another negative here. So, 5 out of seven signs apply to me. I, as it happens, am not gay. I am, in fact, a well adjusted heterosexual male in a long term committed relationship. This kind of labeling serves no purpose. It encourages parents to make incorrect assumptions about their children, embarrassing confrontations, and disturbing “treatments” (see my previous rant on Love In Action). Above all, it’s wrong. Those things have more to do with gender roles then sexuality. Maybe the two are often overlapped, but they are not the same thing. Transvestites enjoy dressing as the opposite sex. But most of them are not actually gay. Common misconception. Because that is a gender role, not a sexuality issue. People like this guy make me sick. You want your boy to grow up into a man? Try loving him for who he is. Not punishing him for being a little different.
Aug/11
2005
There are some great equalizers in life. Traffic jams are one of them. No matter how much you spent on your car, or how much debt it cost you, no matter if you're wearing Channel or rotty cutoffs when you're stuck in traffic it's all the same. The uber-expensive and the shitbox, side by side - in fact as long as the seat springs aren't poking you in the ass, the A/C moderately works and you have some tunes to play then it really doesn't matter if you're on vinyl or kid glove leather. Stuck is stuck. I commute, and this constitutes a significant portion of my life. There's a certain Zen to it all, locked in an exitless stretch, creeping along... here we are, in our little compartments, coexisting. Is this a definition of a successful society? After all we are all getting along...
Aug/09
2005
So if I recall correctly, the woman who was the poster-child for anti-helmet laws in Florida was dead within weeks after the repeal was passed. Yeah you guessed it - from a motorcycle accident and not wearing a helmet. It's also true that in the last 3 years that motorcycle fatalities in florida have gone up 81% from the previous 3 years. That alone speaks volumes, 3 years is no trend.... even though the morons who are still trying to defend their "rights" (probably the same people who think suicide should be illegal) on the basis that road conditions and driver compenency weren't evaluated. I don't suppose explaining to these people that situational conditions that caused the event doesn't matter - once you go down, for whatever reason, either you have a helmet on ... or you don't. Well honestly, it's no big deal to anyone if you choose to mush your head on the road... so long as it's a complete fatality. It's the medical cost that's the big issue. In the past 30 months the cost has gone from $21 to $44 million. And that money is not paid up front by the people campaining for their "rights". For years safety rights advocates have fought the losing battle that the "right" to be stupid does not outweigh the overall burden on society. My recommendation is - you choose not to wear a helmet, you've just chosen not to have any medical assistance in a crash unless you can pay for it all up front. I don't want my medical premiums being jacked for your stupidity, and you know no one will openly admit they ride without a helmet if it would actually cost them out of pocket. Stupid is as stupid does, and the rest of us should be able to laugh at it and walk away without digging into our pockets to support it.
Aug/08
2005
Remember this name: Bunnatine Greenhouse, and I'll tell you why. Because this woman represents all that's right with our government. Of course she's about to get fired for it, but this woman has all the balls that our current administration doesn't. Here's the story: "Bunny" is the Principal Assistant Responsible for Contracting for the Army. She has an excellent resume for someone raised in a segregated America with 3 masters degrees and 20 years experience in supervising contracting. Until just recently her performance reviews have been "outstanding", she was (and continues to be) the model of what someone supervising the spending of billions of dollars should be: morally strong and with a consience of steel. But this is not what the Bush Jr. governement is about - and therein lies the rub. Lets cut to the chase, what did she do to warrant being fired (as she's about to be?): She blew the wistle on the Halliburton contracts. To be precise she raised questions on the following issues: - KBR being awarded three multibillion-dollar war-related contracts, two of them without competitive bidding. ($20 bill if you're really intersted) - "Out of control" costs by KBR to supply our troops in Bosnia - "Why is Halliburton -- a giant Texas firm that holds more than 50 percent of all rebuilding efforts in Iraq -- getting billions in contracts without competitive bidding? Do the durations of those contracts make sense? Have there been violations of federal laws regulating how the government can spend its money? "(AP) In fact it's gotten so bad that her supervisors have gone around her back, on a day she was out of the office, to issue an emergency waiver to allow KBR (Halliborton) to ignore demands from DoD auditors for information regarding a $61 million overcharge for fuel in Iraq. Now this 60 year old black woman has suddenly become the target of the institution she's worked for. Her reviews were just as suddenly negative "difficult to work with, no one likes her" and she's on 3 months probation. Further, they've tried to humiliate her by demoting her, reducing her staff, and now her bosses make note of every word she says during meetings. Facts are facts - Bunny has stood up for truth and honesty as her job defines it and higher. She's questioned the fact that KBR has been allowed into government meetings for defining the contracts they were ultimately awarded with no competition.... and she's going to be crucified for doing her job. Bunny G > *. You rock woman, don't let them get you down.
Aug/06
2005

Don't say it if...

...you don't mean it. I, and all my colleagues work a rotating shift. Which means every two weeks, we work all night. One of my coworkers has consistently fallen asleep at night. He even does it occasionally during the days even. HE has been written up repeatedly and human resources finally put him on FINAL NOTICE™ along with a recommendation that he see a doctor to determine if he has a sleeping disorder. So, he broke down and did it. And low and behold, he has a sleeping disorder that causes him to sleep poorly, and to be unable to prevent himself from falling asleep at odd hours. The doctor wrote a work order that prevents him from working night shifts. Naturally, this presents a problem for him working a rotating shift. HR can't have someone with a disorder working against doctor's orders. So, they reworked the schedule on a temporary basis so that he could get help. The doctor has now confirmed that there is nothing they can do. The only way to counteract it is to work a steady day shift. Which he has done and it’s helped. However, HR and our management have issues a new decree. If he can’t work nights, he’s going to be laid off. He has three weeks to “get better or get out”. Even worse, he can't just agree to go back on nights. He has to get the doctor to approve it. Which the doctor won't do because the diagnoses is clear. Now, if you tell someone to get tested, don’t you have to deal with the results? I dunno. I don’t like the guy that much. Just seems wrong to me. Don't tell him to do something, then tell him too bad anyway.
Aug/06
2005
An anti-gay group has taken to picketing military funerals. Here are just a few choice quotes... "The first sin was being a part of this military. If this young man had a clue and any fear of God, he would have run, and not walked, from this military," said protester Shirley Phelps-Roper. "Who would serve a nation that is godless and has flipped off, defiantly defied, defiantly flipped off, the Lord their God?" And then there's this... One protester had an American flag tied to his belt that draped to the ground. He was holding a sign that read, "Thank God For IEDs," which are explosive devices used by insurgents to blow up military convoys. Protesters said America has ignored the word of God, and those who defend the nation must pay a price. Wow. http://news.yahoo.com/s/kmbc/20050805/lo_kmbc/2866367
Aug/05
2005
Poll: Fewer Americans Think Bush Is Honest 10:49 p.m. ET WASHINGTON (AP) -- Less than half of Americans now say they think President Bush is honest.. My only comment? Wtf took you people so long? And why didn't you have this figured out last year?
Aug/04
2005
So, let's say you were a manager at a company. One with lots of financial and personal information of it's cliental. As a manager you hire a contractor to fill a temporary void in your staffing. Call it a 3 month contract deal. Now, your company has very strict rules about access restrictions, due to the information that is available. As a manager, which of the following seems appropriate: A: Follow the guidelines and file a request for access for the contractor. That process could take over a month. B: Allow the contractor to use a terminal you log in and maintain careful supervision of him while he works. C: Give your login information to the contractor to allow him to access what he wants at his whim. If you answered C, don't be surprised when it comes back to haunt you. As it did recently in a case I had to deal with. You see, said contractor was arrested for a number of really serious while collar crimes associated with his previous employment. So now the happy manager is in the middle of a huge investigation that will result in his termination. That's already been decided, though I doubt he knows it. So, lesson to the masses... those procedures, while often asinine and annoying, are generally there for a reason. Just a friendly piece of advice from your neighborhood guy that has to deal with this crap. I don't enjoy it when police need my testimony, k?
Aug/03
2005
Yeah once again our great leader (W. Personal Slogan: "Do as I say not as I do") is on vacation. This time for 33 days straight. Nice eh? Most of us get 2 weeks a year IF we're lucky and very often way less because we're forced to burn it for personal issues (buying a house, having a kid, death of an Aunt or Uncle). I think it's just awesome that he's managed to break the record for the longest presidental "retreat" in history. It's also fucking impressive that for the president of the nation he's spent over 20% of his tenure back at his ranch, as opposed to say - in Washington where the work gets done. Our boy also doesn't work nights or weekends, aaand he takes a 2-hour workout break every day, again unlike so much of America. It must be fucking nice to be Da Prez. Maybe someone can get him a T-Shirt.. "Who Me Work?"
Aug/03
2005
Why should the relatives of a bunch of illegal aliens get money from the truck company that was used to smuggle them into the US? I dunno, but I'm supposing their attitude is that it doesn't hurt to try.... "VICTORIA, Texas (AP) -- Relatives of seven people who died in the nation's deadliest immigrant smuggling attempt have sued the maker of a trailer, a trucking company and the driver." So here's the dope. Your cousin decides to sneak into the US. Ok stop right there - that IS against our laws. That's a crime. You don't "sneak" into a country - you need permission, a passport, a ticket. Lets say your cousin dies in the process of sneaking in. Now you say, "hey! great time to try and grub some free cash..." I can see perhaps suing the driver, because even though he was paid for the crime it was his fault they died. Long shot there. Should you sue someone for failing to hold up their end of a crime? Especially when you're the one hiring him for the deed? Hard to say really. What about the maker of the trailer? I mean fuck, they should have foreseen that their product was going to be used for transportation of foreigners who want to sneak into the US... naturally, of course. They should have put in air vents, fold down seats, maybe even installed a convenience. And of course there's the trucking company - from whom the truck was leased. Now of course the relatives want to make some green off their deceased - whom if they had really cared about while they were alive might have sponsored or invited or paid for them to travel legally. But no, now it's time to waste man-hours of the justice system of the country their relatives tried to rip off. The suits range from product liability to wrongful death and negligence, and these assholes want millions of dollars. My solution? Cut the knot. If these relatives are in the US - deport them. If they're not - heave the charges on the basis of "how stupid do you think we are"? Filing a lawsuit based on the failure of an illegal act should result in the formal ass-kicking of the plaintiff off US soil. Adios. And don't come back.
Aug/02
2005
So we're allied with Pakistan yes? They don't sponsor terrorists right? Neither do they allow foreigners to come to Pakistan for religous indoctrination in hate-techniques (as we've just witnessed in the UK). They are modern thinking, on the edge of womens rights? ROFL. Ok, ok, before a serious case of Pinnochio syndrome sets in here's yet another case of the fucked up third world mentality that the US supports: Meet Dr. Shazia Kahlid. This woman was raped by an Army Captain of their national forces. Now it's quite commmon in this back-assward nation to expect the woman to roll over and die. Quite literally. She's now "stained" and this "stain" can be applied to her family so she needs to be killed. That's right - amazing isn't it? She's the victim and yet she needs to die and her attacker can go have a soda. Well she stood up, and worse her husband stood up for her. The result? - They (the Pakistan government) drugged her and put her in a mental institution - They put her and her husband under house arrest - They spread rumors she was a prostitute - Finally they were threatened by the government with death, basically "stay and we'll kill you", and put her and her husband on a plane -without- her son, and shoved her off to the UK. First they had her make a video about how wonderful Pakistan was, and how helpful they were. WHAT THE FUCK. His grandfather even demanded she be killed and started to call people to get a mob together to enforce it. Outstanding. Now they have family in Canada, and when they got to the UK and applied to Canada for asylum they were DENIED. Why? Because Canada said "Oh well you're in the UK". Now they're stuck in the UK, with no money, no family, nothing. In the original article from the Times the author asks for help for this couple - I'll reprint it here: "You can suggest that by writing to Joseph Volpe, Minister of Citizenship and Immigration, Ottawa, Ontario K1A 1L1, Canada. You can send e-mail to Minister@cic.gc.ca. If Canada gives Dr. Shazia asylum, this love story can still end well; otherwise, I'm afraid it'll be one more tragedy." I've already sent a short email, please help - Pakistan is one fucked up country. Help this woman get a place in a country where she can at least have a family that was taken from her. (Full NY Times article here)
Aug/01
2005
You know what I hate? It's dickless fuckheads who posture for public attention by misusing their authority. I know it happens a lot, but in this case I'm referring to first Romney and now Pataki. In both cases these bastards are playing to the conservative audience that does NOT, repeat NOT represent their state or even the people that elected them. Massachusetts and New York are both states with strong sentiment regarding womens rights. And in both case they know damn well they'll be overruled by their legislation. So why? Simple. These days fashionable religous conservatism has created a mystique , albiet a bullshit one, that if you pander to the extremists it will get you elected (Gods I can't wait for that balloon to pop). In both cases their veto to prevent emergency contraception to women who have been rape victims is pure political greed. I would honestly doubt that either "man" has ever been in an emergency room to council a women who has just been raped. I would give up a tooth to have either of them actually sit and explain to the woman who has just been physically and emotionally devastated their reasons for piling yet another emotional wound onto their pain. "Yes, it's my belief that you really DO need to have the baby of the man that just raped you... don't worry you have 9 months to think about it". These bastards only, ONLY have their interests at heart (gee, will this garner more press? will it make the conservatives invite me to expensive fund-rasing dinners?) and has no compassion or understanding of the realities of the situation. It's a pipe dream, but I hope their nieces will come up to them tomorrow "Hey Uncle, I heard you decided to use your authority to deny women like me emergency contraception... I hope you rot in hell...".
Jul/30
2005

Being an only child

When someone tells me I must be spoiled if I since I am an only child, I want to kick them in the shin. OK maybe I got more attention and stuff in my direction, but it isn't necessarily worth it. Lets examine this. I my be spoiled if: 1. Fighting for every ounce of autonomy is spoiled, then OK I’m spoiled. 2. Being the main focus of two over bearing people is spoiled, then I’m spoiled. 3. Having your parents do something for you that you may or may not wanted done and being called ungrateful cause you didn’t promptly do x, y and z to say thank you is spoiled, then I’m spoiled. 4. Having your parents “help you” by inserting themselves in every intimate aspect of you life is spoiled, then I am spoiled. 5. Having parents that assume there are no boundaries between you and them is spoiled, then I’m spoiled. 6. When you set boundaries you get told how ungrateful / rotten / spoiled you are is being spoiled, then I’m spoiled. Why do I write this? My parents were at my house for an extended stay. I have learned to stuff a lot of feeling for the sake of keeping peace. Well, my mother decided to “help” me by going through some of my paperwork (bills, correspondence, catalogs, etc.) and I lost it. Then my father started with a tirade about how I am ungrateful and horrible and spoiled. As if it is unreasonable to think that something in my life should be private.
Jul/30
2005

Inside voice! INSIDE VOICE!!!!

I don't understand why this concept isn't grasped by people at a young age. Maybe my mother was just better at instilling lessons such as this. When you're inside, particularly in work environment, you don't actually need to project your voice like an opera singer. If you're talking to your coworker five feet away, I really don't need to hear you enunciate every syllable when I'm fifty feet away. Honest. The hum of discussion is fine. And even the occasional moment with raised voices is fine. I don't care about your problems, your commentary on your sex life, or your weekend plans. Nor does your work particularly interest me. If I wanted to be enthuses by your mindlessly boring job, I'm certain I could teach myself how to change users to 'backupstaff' and type the complex command string './backup -t'. Just because you do it one hundred times doesn't mean it's hard. Nor does it mean I want to HEAR you talking about it every fucking time you type it. Pipe down already.