Apr/30
2011
Anyone else disgusted with the Catholic Church's self-aggrandizement? The Beatification of an Ex-Pope and his "miracles" are nothing more than their way of cashing in on someone even after they're dead. Of course when it comes to cashing in on the deceased they're the Pros aren't they? Heck if JP were to magically come back they'd probably hope he'd keel over a second time just to keep the "trend in line with history." It's gross. John Paul was a man. Yeah he probably worked hard, and yeah he probably was a little smarter, and little more caring and gave up more than most for a lifetime position, but in the end he ate, slept and took a shit like the rest of us. Was he a saint? No. Not any more than Gandhi, Lincoln or Biko. For most people that would be enough. But not for the Catholic church apparently, who just can't let a dead man rest in peace. Not when there's money or attention involved.
Apr/30
2011
The really rough ones are the 7am to 7pm Saturday and Sunday classes. You're pretty ripped up by the time it's over. Monday comes along and you sink into your desk chair at work and think 'Aaaaaah.' It's rough I tell you, just rough. I teach Motorcycle safety, yes on weekends, and no it's clearly not my day job although the pay is pretty good for someone with mostly on-the-job training and limited experience. I say limited because I'm not a professional trainer, nor a pro-racer. I'm just someone that rode safely for a decade that hates to see other people get hurt. Maybe it's that last part that really matters because there's plenty of people out there who think "Well hell, I cracked up at least a half dozen times learning to ride, why shouldn't everyone else?" Maybe they think it's some sort of deranged trial-by-fire ideal, 'I had to suffer to learn and so should you.' Well I never suffered, and that was for two reasons: one was dumb luck and the other was my own good sense. It was dumb luck that I never had the *opportunity* to ride when I was younger but when the chance did materialize I had the *good sense* to take a training class. And the training taught me how to ride without the pain of failure. But that's neither here nor there. No does it explain why I toss away six to eight weekends in the best months of the year to stand for hours on hot, unforgiving pavement yelling "Turn your head! Clutch! Brake, brake, brake!" and so on. Nor why I spend hours repeating material I know well enough that it's hard to even focus on to read. Nor even why I choose to stand in the rain as it dribbles down my neck hoping that someone who just hopped on a motorcycle a few hours ago will actually apply the brakes before hitting me. And we won't go into the part about taking shelter in a metal shipping container during a thunderstorm. Oh and did I mention that the container had open cans of gas in it? I do this on my weekends and yeah I get paid. Enough to buy new tires for my car, or help pay for a vacation. Certainly not enough to buy a new 600 RR or R1000. It's hard, when Friday rolls around and everyone is like "So, you gonna bbq this weekend or what?" Nah, I'm going to bust my ass for 12 to 20 hours then try and cram in some food shopping, laundry, yard work and cleaning. Then get some rest on Monday when I can sit down again. Is it worth it? I guess so. Not because of the money, but because of the satisfaction I feel when I see someone riding well. Sure maybe they had to suffer to get that far, but then again maybe they didn't. And even if I had nothing to do with the fact that they have a decent gear on, or they roll on the throttle as they take a turn, I know that a bunch of other people out there *are* doing the same, having a great time. Because of me. I guess that makes it worth it.
Apr/29
2011
Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer meets carnival-ring-toss next to a canoe overrun by moldy grape jelly? I dunno. All I do know is that it's not just wrong but hilariously, embarrassingly, distractingly, hideously and breath-takingly wrong. And they're princesses? Damn. No wonder royalty has all but died out. I guess all the inbreeding just nixes the ability to look in a mirror and grasp the joke. Wonder if anyone tried to "toss one through the ringer"? I know if I'd had a plate of hor'dourves handy at least one mini-wiener would have made it through. Other notes: The Queen's chapeau was the most tasteful of the lot and the only problem with Camilla's was that it didn't go far enough to hide the signature horse-schnozz.
Apr/29
2011
You can read it but you may not believe it.
The 37-year-old Barnes catapulted to instant fame for an alleged multi-tasking mash-up that earned the bottle-blonde's mug shot a spot on hundreds of Web sites. According to a startled Florida Highway Patrol trooper, Barnes was shaving her bikini area while driving south on the famed Overseas Highway when she crashed into the rear of an SUV March 2. In the police report obtained by ABC News, the trim job was apparently essential because the arresting officer, trooper Gary Dunick, said the Indiana native told him she was heading to Key West visit her boyfriend. "She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready for the visit," Dunick told the Key West Citizen. It gets weirder. In order to pay full attention to her sensitive regions, police say Barnes enlisted her ex-husband, Charles Judy, who was riding shotgun, to hold the wheel. [..] Their tag-team driving went awry when an SUV driving in front of them slowed to turn. Barnes' 1995 Thunderbird smashed into it. Two of the SUV's passengers suffered minor injuries, police say. Barnes shouldn't have been driving that Thunderbird, since she had been convicted the previous day for driving under the influence and driving with a suspended license. According to the arrest report, it was the sixth time her license had been suspended.(ABC News)
Luckily, here at World of Suck, we're not constrained by silly slogans like "all the news that's fit to print." Clearly that's not our motto. We're more like "all the fucked up shit that we can't believe." And this is a prime example. So one more time, let me see if I have this straight. 40ish bimbo who is driving WITH a revoked license to see her boyfriend asks her X, who happens to be in the car, to steer while she takes a razor to her poonany. They crash because really one person needs to control both the direction AND velocity of a vehicle. Not two. Like they were doing. Moreover, while they label her as distracted, what about him? Do ya really think he had 100% of his focus on the road as a familiar twat was being sheared within hand's reach? (Btw don't bother to answer, that was called a "rhetorical" question.) I suppose the MOST amazing thing is that even after getting into a crash, and knowing full well that she wasn't supposed to be behind the wheel she has the, uh, balls to act all nonchalant with the Officer.
According to the arrest affidavit, the trooper asked her afterward why she didn't hit the brakes when she saw the SUV. She answered bluntly, "I told you, I was shaving."
And there you have it folks! Hopefully she hasn't and won't ever reproduce. For the sake of all humanity.
Apr/29
2011
I have a project that has become a royal pain in the ass. Most of the people I am dealing with have little or no technical background, but they want answers to their questions. I struggle to comply, sometimes with "help" (see prior post about my letter from hell) Now I am told after toiling for a month that I did not answer their questions. They sent a highly technical letter from their science advisor, and I responded in like. Actually their letter was more of a stream of conscienceness than a question and it is even more difficult to respond to a rambling missive. I wish I could tell these folks that I did answer their questions exhaustively and that I am not surprised they don't understand that I did answer. I could answer simply, but I know then the follow-up would be "why?", not unlike a 3 yr old. The answers would likely be understood as well as a 3 yr old might understand. Maybe if one of them had a degree in one of the sciences, heck even a class or two, I might actually be able to get through, but I know that is wishing for too much. I have an idea! Maybe I can just say "Because I said so!" like I might say to a 3rd old. Unfortunately, I know it wouldn't work. Hand me the Tylenol please, I feel my headache coming back . . . .
Apr/28
2011

Why'd You Ask?

I had someone call and leave me a message to ask what I thought was appropriate for a portion of a project. I am going to have a strong vote on what is ultimately approved and I know more about this aspect than my colleagues, so it was not an unreasonable call. I wasn't able to return the call (she wasn't there). Although I had more pressing matters, I fired off a quick e-mail outlining my preferred approach. Then this morning I get an email essentially saying: "I was thinking of x,y and z". All I can say is, if she had an idea, why didn't she flesh it out for all to review. I didn't think she was the type to deliberately yank my chain, but was I wrong? I forgive, but I don't forget. If this person asks my "advice" again, I will tell her to show me what she is thinking before I devote any effort.
Apr/28
2011
I want the two minutes of my life back, the two minutes I spent this week being annoying about the stupid fucking birther business. Anyone who thinks Trump actually did this for the benefit of our nation is so retarded they should be immediately instutitionalized, preferably in another country. Trump only cares about himself. Everyone should have gotten that by now since the clues (Trump Tower, Trump Toilet Paper, Trump TV, Tump Hairpieces) are everywhere. He's a rich dickhead with lots of time to spend and he spends it only to amuse himself at other people's expense. That's what this birther crap is about, his way of influencing politics by sticking up a huge scarecrow and frightening off any rational republican that might want to run. And who can blame them? What sane person who actually has an interest in helping America wants to waste their valuable time debating vapid and meaninless fiction? Already the ranks have been thinned for the front runners to where the "contenders" consist exclusively of zanies and wackjobs. If that's his way of thinning the herd to try and pinch the nomination for himself then he's done a damn good job. Machiavelli would be proud. Honestly he's free to waste his time and money on anything, but what I resent most is how his time and others could have been spend on *useful* dialog. Like say on the economy, the wars, immigration, taxes, China, health care... ANYTHING other than something that contributes zero to our national wellbeing and wastes untold dollars in air time and political salaries. Trump is one evil asshole. Elect him if you really want to see someone worse than Cheney in charge. The United States of Trump. You heard it here first.
Apr/27
2011
The Obamas sat down with Oprah. In response to Oprah asking why he took so long to release his birth certificate, the President answered:
"We are living in a very serious time. And America has huge potential and opportunity to seize the 21st century. We're only gonna get there, though, if we have a serious conversation about the things that matter to people," Obama said. "We can't be distracted by sideshows and carnival barkers going around, trying to get attention."
Am I the only person who finds a bit of humor that a president appears on an afternoon talk show and discusses being serious? I am working when Oprah airs. Even if I were home, I would have other things I personally find way more "serious" to do than watch a talk show. Furthermore, how much of the taxpayer's money was used to fly him and his wife to Chicago and pay for the secret service to keep them safe. (It's not like we have a deficit or anything.) I guess it was a golden opportunity for him to continue his re-election campaign by the side of this buddy Oprah. Saying "serious" and criticizing "sideshows" while appearing on a talk show doesn't add up to me. I may have to DVR the May 2 episode just so I can see if he said it with a straight face . . .
Apr/27
2011
I had more than 12 items, I'll admit that up front, I actually had 14 but when I got in line I really thought I only had 12. I'd forgotten the two bags of cold cuts. My basket was almost full, almost. Maybe it was two-thirds full, but it was only 1 basket. When I put my items on the belt they took up about a foot of room (I pack neatly and together). The woman in front of me was juggling a baby, a cart, her card and the checkout all at once. I had patience and sympathy for her because it was an armload. Moreover the store wasn't really all that busy so sure, that was ok for me to wait a minute or two. So I put down the little plastic bar for the next person behind me. When I did she slammed down her two packages of m&m cookies so hard they nearly shattered into a billion bits (hear that like Karl Sagan would have said it.) Eh? Whatever, I went back to my business because baby-lady had left and the cashier was now ringing me through. The first item was the speed bump. Apparently bar codes on frozen burritos can be tricky. It cost about a two minute hangup. After that it was all clear, green light go, starting gun getaway, and let-er rip. Apparently that wasn't good enough for the woman behind me because she left in a huff, or so I presume from the expression on the two new women that were now in line right behind me. "Well what's HER problem ?" one remarked. "No idea, you can't live your life being angry" said the other. I took it from those comments that Cookie Woman was furious about the burrito hold up. I chatted with the other two women as I finished checking out. Neither one seemed to care about my fourteen items in the twelve item express lane. One of them even went so far as to wish me a nice day. Cookie Woman will probably burst a blood vessel before she gets home. All because of my mis-counting mishap (and the burritos which I can't take responsibility for.) It's sad that some people have to be so angry all the time, but the rest of us don't need the anger, or the hate for that matter. Lady? Take your cookies and stuff 'em. Where the sun don't shine. And while you're at it you can put your attitude right there too.
Apr/27
2011
I'm fucking sick of this shit already. Seems like every other goddamned day there's a new set of updates. Between getting them jammed down my throat at work in the middle of the day, eating up my CPU and forcing a reboot as I'm trying to get shit done and coming home to "weeee! you've been updated, yay hooray!" shit I've had enough! ENOUGH ALREADY. And that fucking goes for you too Adobe. Oh and STOP putting new icons for Acrobat on my desk. I don't want 'em there and I never have.
Apr/26
2011
I consider this a nice break from the usual shootings and stabbings you read about in good ol' NYC.
NEW YORK (AP) -- A brawl involving cricket bats and small swords at a Sikh temple in New York City has led to riot and assault charges against seven people. Police say the defendants interrupted prayer services at the Baba Makhan Shah Lubana Sikh Center in Queens on Sunday. They were arraigned Monday.
Short swords and cricket bats? It's a statement that they were culturally sensitive enough to import their own weapons when rioting. Style points there boys, definitely style points. Yep definitely something I love about The City, everyone brings their own...special...something to the mix.
Apr/26
2011
Hey Ladies! You're a bright bunch!
WASHINGTON (AP) -- For the first time, American women have passed men in gaining advanced college degrees as well as bachelor's degrees, part of a trend that is helping redefine who goes off to work and who stays home with the kids. Census figures released Tuesday highlight the latest education milestone for women, who began to exceed men in college enrollment in the early 1980s. [..] Among adults 25 and older, 10.6 million U.S. women have master's degrees or higher, compared to 10.5 million men. [..] When it comes to finishing college, roughly 20.1 million women have bachelor's degrees, compared to nearly 18.7 million men - a gap of more than 1.4 million that has remained steady in recent years. Women first passed men in bachelor's degrees in 1996.
So there you go. The data doesn't lie. More women are more educated and the trend is growing. Too bad there's another trend growing as well. The one where salaries are not keeping pace with inflation (or in some cases actually declining) in professions that have seen an influx of women. Yep that's right. Business are more than happy to pay a woman less than a man for the same day's work, 22% less in fact. That's actually good news because in 2000 women got paid a whopping 54% less than men. So cheaper is better when competing for the same job.
Unemployment for men currently stands at 9.3 percent compared to 8.3 percent for women, who now make up half of the U.S. work force.
Better educated, better employed, less paid. And it gets better, of course, because those in power are being cowed by a vocal minority who want to go even farther to make sure women never succeed by imposing restrictions on their reproductive rights. It's pretty damn hard to make a decent living without a guarantee to a fair wage if you get pregnant. Tough luck if it wasn't intended or wanted. So yeah, great news, women are better educated. And now the bad: that and a dollar won't let you get ahead or even stay employed if you have kids. Oh and if you don't? Then you get branded as weird, anti-social, or gay (sometimes all of the above) which I guess is better than what you get labeled with if you decide to raise your kids on your own. Nope, sorry sisters, you can't win. They just won't let you no matter how hard you try.
Apr/26
2011
This kid is awesome and he should have his own show...
According to the U.K.'s Portsmouth News, a 16-year-old with a clearly refined sense of humor decided to block all the water passages in a restroom at a public library. Using all of the ingenuity at his disposal, he shoved toilet paper down the sinkholes and then turned on all the taps. Being socially conscious, he did this late in the evening, so that water would happily pour away all night. Oddly, more than $200,000 worth of damage ensued from his amusement. Naturally, he pleaded not guilty. This was until the prosecutor, who, having done what so many prosecutors do these days, showed that he had trawled Facebook for the accused's inner musings. It seems that, though he had publicly protested his innocence, the accused had answered a question on Facebook as to whether he might be guilty. His reply: "Kind of, yeah. I've kept it to myself. A few mates know (CNET)
Considering that this ape thought that swamping the library (it was closed 5 months for repairs as a result) was a lark it's pretty apparent why he thought 'no one would ever notice' when he owned up to it on Facebook. Hopefully it'll be a fair warning to any woman that he tries to date: "Keep away from this one, he's just too stupid to reproduce."
Apr/26
2011
The Donald has pulled the whole Obama "birther" issue to the surface again. The White House has its panties in a bunch because Rev. Franklin Graham made the following statement (from Foxnews.com):
Graham, who has met with Obama before, appeared on ABC's "This Week" and was asked about people like Donald Trump bringing up questions about the president's birth. "Well, the -- the president I know has some issues to deal with here. He can solve this whole birth certificate issue pretty quickly. I don't -- I was born in a hospital in Asheville, North Carolina, and I know that my records are there," Graham said. "You can probably even go and find out what room my mother was in when I was born. I don't know why he can't produce that. So I'm not -- I don't know. But it's an issue that looks like he could -- he could answer pretty quickly," he added.
Did Graham say that Obama was not born in Hawaii as he claims? No, not at all. He merely stated the obvious, that Obama should be able to easily provide more proof to those that are skeptical, that he and his mother could easily allow the hospital where he was born to release any records. Both the birther's incessant demand for proof and Obama administration's indignant whining every time someone points out that the issue could be better resolved are equally annoying. The whole issue has made be think about what exactly the Founding Fathers intended for the President of this Country. Article 2, Section 1 of the Constitution states:
No person except a natural born Citizen . . . shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty-five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.
The exact definition of "natural born Citizen" aside, Obama has lived within the US for 14 years. However, what is troubling to many is that during some of his formative years he lived outside this country and that perhaps his allegiances are not in this country's best interest. I wonder if the Founding Father's would have made any revisions to their Article 2 of the Constitution if they knew that people would be able to travel as easily as they do today. Personally, I think Obama's birth place is moot at this point. He's in office, and he's been in office. The damage has been done. I'm just hoping that the Republicans can put a candidate on the ticket that isn't a rabid Right-to-Life, Corporate-Handout lunatic.
Apr/25
2011
Ok I'll lay this out straight: If you have to put a collar on your single, 25-lb plate when you're benching then you're a fucking retard. Simple yes? First of all no one, and I repeat NO ONE needs a collar on a single plate. Collars are for weights that are HEAVY. Or for weights that are stacked so deep the Olympic-style bar fucking bends like al-dente pasta when you pick it up. THAT is when you need collars. Not for your fucking puny-ass, girlie-man 50lbs of metal. Frankly if you can't bench 90 lbs of weight you shouldn't be on the goddamned bench in the first place. Instead try working up to it on the Universal or whatever machines they have. Because if you're worried that your weight might "slide off" the two foot bar as you're thrashing around trying to lift it all of a foot then you're just too gayballs to be lifting in a gym at all. Probably just doing a single pushup is more than you're capable of. Work up to it ok? Shoo little man. Go back to your 'strenuous' yoga classes. Free weights are not for girlie-men like you.
Apr/25
2011
Sloth? Check. Gluttony? Check. Greed? Probably check. One more and this guy could have had a over 50% of the Seven Deadly Sins all wrapped up and tied with a bow. What was he doing? He was sleeping in his car. At lunch time. In the parking lot. With the engine running. Yep that's right. Chair fully reclined this guy was passed out cold in his car burning gallons of gas and going nowhere. I don't get it. It was only in the 60's today so why did he need the engine running? I can't see it being too cold (he was wearing a T-shirt) and I can't see it being too hot (it was drizzly, rainy and totally overcast.) You don't need the engine running to listen to the radio so this guy was going to sleep for an HOUR in his car with the engine running just to burn an hour's worth of gas. Dickhead. Our country, fuck that, the entire world is in a crisis and this guy is doing all he can to waste what resources we have. Gas now costs over $4 a gallon in many places and he's gonna burn at least one if not two gallons just so he can snooze at work during lunch. Really I couldn't care that he was sleeping. Nor do I care that he chose to do it in his car. But the fact that he had to have the engine running to cool his fat ass as he slept during a gray and rainy day (maybe just open the back windows next time?) pisses me off no end. I should have stuffed a sock in his tailpipe. Maybe next time I will.
Apr/24
2011
You've got a router, I've got a router, almost everyone has a router and a good many of them probably even the majority are wireless. Since a wireless router is just that - wireless - it means you can connect any time, any place, any where as long as you're within range of the signal. Keep in mind the signal doesn't stop at physical boundaries like walls. Nor does it stop virtual boundaries like property lines. In fact the only thing that constrains a wireless signal is distance and... access, meaning passwords. Now passwords are a pain, and a vast number of people don't even bother to change the default encryption and some don't even bother password protecting their connection at all. This means anyone can get on at any time. Digital Noblesse Oblige? Helping those that have-not? Perhaps. But apparently it can fuck up your life big time if the wrong person decides to take advantage of your hospitality...
Within three days, investigators determined the homeowner had been telling the truth: If someone was downloading child pornography through his wireless signal, it wasn't him. About a week later, agents arrested a 25-year-old neighbor and charged him with distribution of child pornography. The case is pending in federal court.(AP)
But before those three days the homeowner found himself on the receiving end of a very nasty visit by the feds. And he's not the only one. More than one person has found himself staring down a barrel or face down on the floor while agents tear their house apart and confiscate their personal electronics.
It was 6:20 a.m. March 7 when he and his wife were awakened by the sound of someone breaking down their rear door. He threw a robe on and walked to the top of the stairs, looking down to see seven armed people with jackets bearing the initials I-C-E, which he didn't immediately know stood for Immigration and Customs Enforcement. "They are screaming at him, 'Get down! Get down on the ground!' He's saying, 'Who are you? Who are you?'" Covert said. "One of the agents runs up and basically throws him down the stairs, and he's got the cuts and bruises to show for it," said Covert, who said the homeowner plans no lawsuit. When he was allowed to get up, agents escorted him and watched as he used the bathroom and dressed.
I don't feel that password protecting a router is that big a deal... for most of us. But there are several classes of people for whom it is an issue, for example aging parents or non-English speakers. Following the directions, or getting tech support to set up a device might be more than they can handle. Further there are times when the device 'just happens' to reset or require a reboot to it's default state. My point is that most people have the knowhow to manage their router most of the time, but there are some people and some times when a person might not be aware that their system is open or unprotected. But if someone decides to leech off their connection and download kiddie porn does that risk mean the owner should get their door broken in and a jackboot to the head? If it does then clearly there need to be warning labels on the side of every router that explains the risk of owning and operating a device that could get your ass arrested. Another idea would be to have the router come equipped with a speaker that would periodically sound an alarm if it were left unencrypted, and perhaps provide another audible alert if a new connection were made without first authorizing the connection. Or maybe people need to get education and a "license" to surf the net? We make people get dog licenses in case fido bites someone. We make people get driving licenses to make sure they know how to safely operate a device. Yes I know these are stupid ideas, but seriously, do you want to wake up with ICE in your bedroom screaming "GET DOWN!" and roughing you up? No, you don't and neither do I. Protecting something you can't see, hear or touch requires a certain amount of dedication, and nothing so simple as putting up a "Keep Off My Wireless" sign will really work. I'm not sure what's do be done, but a good place to start would be to know if you're at risk and what the consequences of accepting that risk really are.