u235

I never usually have long to wonder about the IQ level of the person driving the car in front of me. There's a simple test - if the guy in front has to repeatedly step on the brakes when no one else in a 20 car radius does, then he's an idiot. Oh theres so very MANY types of idiots on the road out there, it's hard to know where to begin. Here's a pop quiz for driver-stupidity level and proposed penalty:

Is the person in front of you doing any of the following?

- cutting you off with less than 6" to spare between himself and the car in front of you?
- cutting over 3 lanes of traffic without signaling?
- talking on a cell phone?
- reading a newspaper or work papers while driving over 60mph?
- shaving?

Meh those are easy ones.... I just propose simple beatings for them.

One of my biggest irks has to do with when I'm trying to smooth out the stop and go spots in a traffic jam. If you have even the intelligence of a snail you can usually do your part to eliminate at least ONE complete halt when you're tied up in traffic. It's a simple trick, just leave some space in front of you so that when the person in front comes to a total stop you can keep rolling and by the time you reach them they're moving again. Think of it as a public service to the 100+ people behind that don't have to step on the brakes. Now there are complete fucktards who will take that 5' of space you just scrounged and shove their fucking fat ass in there, stopping you and everyone else and gaining him maybe 6". Chances are he'll promptly move back to the other lane anyway once it starts to move as well. My suggestion is crucifiction for this breed of asshole.

Another dandy are people who decide it's OK to drive in the breakdown lane right before an exit. It makes it hell for the people who are exiting normally, and is just plain hazardous. I recommend drawing and quartering.

Gawking. I hate gawkers. There might be an accident on the farthest side of the traffic going the opposite direction... but these people HAVE to see it. They will slam on their breaks, head turned sideways, just to ogle whatever they can, oblivious to the mayhem being induced behind them. Immediate death to these types.

I've already ranted on slow drivers in the middle and left lanes, no need to repeat that here. They have their own private level of hell waiting for them.

There's also the idiots that cut right in front of 16-wheelers and slam on the brakes ignoring the fact that the semi can't DO the same thing, oh the list goes on and on. There's so many flavors of assholes out there on the road it's like a bag of gourmet jellybeans... the only difference is that they're all flavors you hate.