Oct/07
2017

tRump Voters And Fucking Assholes

And, are, it's about the same...

The traffic on the highway was pretty terrible. I mean it's usually terrible, but it was 12:30 in the freaking afternoon, ffs, and it was backed up all the hell over. No, it wasn't an accident, it was merely people skipping out for a half day ahead of a long weekend. The stupid was endemic and now it was all over the highway. I made the command decision to get off.

The exit has a rotary, something both common and hateful in New England. As I got off the highway and toodled down the exit ramp the backup from the rotary, as people were trying to "merge" (this word doesn't actually EXIST in the New England vocabulary) the exit ramp was backed up a few cars, no more than four or five. I wanted to get home, but I wasn't in a terrible rush, and the back roads were bound to be more promising. What I neglected was the back-road assholes that came with the situation. As I waited, patiently, a battered white van, a workman's van, came tearing down the exit ramp and drove around me to try and stick it's stubby nose in the half-car-length of space between me and the car ahead.

Ok, seriously. What the everloving fuck was this?

I laid on the horn and pushed my way around the van. Astonished and flabbergasted that anyone would pull such a fuck-brained maneuver.

Then I noticed the tRump bumper sticker on the van, the 50-ish run-down white guy with white hair in a stained shirt at the wheel. He tried driving the van into the side of my car, like that would make me budge. He stopped just short of hitting me.

I rolled down the window "Go vote for tRump ya Dickhead!" I hollered.

"Uh.... Ok! I will!" came the clearly perplexed reply. He couldn't figure if that was an insult or not, even with the "Dickhead" in the sentence.

He was on my bumper. Hard. But it was my turn to get into the rotary. I'd like to apologize to the person I jumped in front of, I generally am quite polite at rotaries, but this called for evasive action. As my car leapt into the whirlpool of cars, I looked back, noting that Asshole tRump-Tarder hadn't made it out behind me. I drove hurriedly though the roundabout, three-quarters of the way around, to my exit, and spared another look back. White van was weaving through the rotary, people braking left and right to avoid a collision.

As I made it to my exit, I noticed that the white van had also pulled out on my exit, but one lane over. Another car was pulled up next to it, and both drivers were screaming at each other through open windows. Relieved that Asshole tRump-Tarder wasn't going my way I thrust one spiraling, fisted, bird out the window and bellowed "FUCK YOU ASSHOLE" which I assumed the target would know to whom THAT was intended and took off on a quick turn away from the conflagration of hate.

tRump-Tarders. Can't live with 'em and they won't do us the favor of shooting themselves. Hopefully 3 more years and they can go back to crawling under their rocks.

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