Category: "Assholes On Parade"

Sep/17
2017

I love it when people identify as pro-tRump. It basically screams: "Stay the fuck away, I'm stupid, delusional and dangerous." I appreciate that the same way I appreciate a rattlesnake in tall grass, catching a glimpse of the white stripe on a skunk or any of the myriad of ways that nature tells us "Do Not Touch." It's extraordinarily helpful.

What's tragic is the impact this mass (and I use the word mass carefully, because although they fluff up to seem like they're bigger and yowl aggressively, Dickhead supporters are in no WAY the majority) stupidity has on people who just want to get along, and by get along I mean the people who don't care enough, who are disgusted enough or are just intimidated enough to tolerate and go along with the frothing, screaming howler monkeys.

Case in point: the "protest" against/for free speech that was also a Dickhead rally in DC this weekend. Delusional fuckers, assholes and shitbags who have NOT spent a moment of their time assessing the facts are on parade to demonstrate what they feel is white repression: how DARE anyone else claim victimhood, whites ARE the power, they are the ones that "built" America, they are the ones in DANGER of losing their majority, kick/kill/murder anyone who says otherwise... and that is the free speech they want to defend.

IF, for some bizarre reason, they were to actually READ the bills being passed, or (gosh) THINK for themselves about the potential consequences of what Dickhead Donald was doing, suddenly the misnomer might reveal itself and reveal that the only FAKERY involved wasn't the news being reported but how Dickhead deliberately lies and mislabels events and his actions. In reality the source of "fake news" is none other than Dickhead himself.

Why else would he be working so hard to hide and obscure information was made public by a prior administration? Why? Because he has THAT much to hide.

Trump still refuses to divest from his real estate and hotel empire or release virtually any of his tax returns. His administration is vigorously pursuing whistleblowers. Among scores of vacant senior jobs in the government is an inspector general for the Department of Energy - led by Secretary Rick Perry, former governor of Texas - as it helps drive the region's recovery from Hurricane Harvey.[..]

"This is an administration that wants to do things their own way and a president that wants to do things his own way," said Rick Blum, director of News Media for Open Government, of which The Associated Press is a member. "(Trump) is frustrated by the institutions our founders established. And he's going to have to learn that the public deserves a free and independent press." (AP)

It's unlikely that tRump supporters will ever realize how badly they're being taken advantage of. It's equally unlikely that they'll ever admit fault, or agree that they were taken in. These are not people who can look back or ponder prior actions. These are pithed-frog people who respond only when poked, people with a total incapacity for self-analysis or awareness. Delusional. Embracing ignorance as a blanket. Putting fingers in their ears and slapping on the blinders because it's the only way they can hold on to hope that the never ending disappointment and disasters of tRump "leadership" is only the dark before the storm.

Of course this self-inflicted blindness also means that smaller governmental structures are ALSO having a field day, taking advantage of the chaos to make local government less transparent as well.

Lawmakers across the country introduced and debated dozens of bills during this year's legislative sessions that would close or limit public access to a wide range of government records and meetings, according to a review by The Associated Press and numerous state press associations.

Most of those proposals did not become law, but freedom-of-information advocates in some states said they were struck by the number of bills they believed would harm the public interest, and they are bracing for more fights next year. (AP)

The US is dividing rapidly into those who drank the Koolaid, with citizens who are happy to embrace ANY schlock so long as it's labelled "patriotic" and "tRump approved" and those who loathe and despise the "Dickhead in chief". The parallels are there between states with more educated, more "liberal" populations versus the less educated, poorer citizenry who are enabling trends against "open government". Those seeking the "quick" solution, those willing to place blind belief in someone who they "feel in their heart" will do the best for them will continue to fail, fail to grasp that hating and hurting is NOT "free speech", fail to recognize that restricting public access to information is NOT a tool to "fight terrorism", fail to act in their own best interests and the interests of their progeny.

I have to give it to Dickhead, he's found the biggest audience for his snakeoil, and there are people who not only love the taste of something that will kill them and their future but will actually clamor for it. Every tRump supporter who is stupid enough to embrace the fantasy and ignore the facts is one more problem that the rest of us have to deal with. Fuck Jonestown, it was small beans. There's a new Jim Jones in charge, and this time he's got the whole US in his sights... and his name is donald tRump.

Sep/14
2017

Dickhead Donald has a LOT more apologizing to do than ESPN does. In fact nothing ESPN said was actually a lie.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump is calling on ESPN to apologize days after one of the sports network's anchors called him a "white supremacist" and "bigot."

ESPN said Thursday it had accepted the apology of its "SportsCenter" host Jemele Hill for her tweets about Trump Monday. Hill said Thursday she was sorry for causing her employer trouble.

ESPN has repeatedly said Hill's comments don't reflect the view of the network. But that apparently hasn't satisfied Trump. He demanded on Twitter early Friday that ESPN "Apologize for untruth!"

Dickhead seems to think that whatever he chooses to say is the "truth". The sky is fuschia or water is dry, no matter how outrageous since he's the president it must be fact.

Dickhead is also one of the most delusional people in Washington, which given the number of politicians in residence, is an outstanding accomplishment.

So hey, Dickhead, message to you buddy: before you demand apologies from anyone, why not take a mea culpa moment for yourself eh? Before the list gets so long that you run out of time...

Sep/11
2017

Scott Pruitt is a total disgrace. Unable and unqualified for the position he holds, he only manages to embarrass himself and the nation with his total stupidity. Which, of course is why his boss LOVES him.

Pope Francis has warned history will judge world leaders who do not act as he blasted climate change sceptics in the wake of Hurricanes Irma and Harvey.

The pontiff said the recent storms meant the effects of climate change could be seen "with your own eyes". There have been four major Atlantic hurricanes in less than three weeks.

But US Environmental Protection Agency head Scott Pruitt said it was an inappropriate time to discuss what role climate change may have played.

Mr Pruitt - who has previously said he "would not agree" carbon dioxide is a primary contributor to global warming - told CNN current speculation "on the cause and effect of the storm... is misplaced".

Instead, Mr Pruitt said the conversation should be focused on the clean up effort.

Scott you're an imbecile. Global warming is real. It's man-made, but there's no amount of reality that will ever convince someone like you, because YOU DON'T CARE about america, it's people, or the future of the planet because it's inconvenient. You want money. You want businesses to make money. You want votes.

But what you don't want is the reality of the results.

To you disasters like Texas and Florida aren't tragedies, they're opportunities to make more money. So what if people suffer, are homeless, need government support? None of that matters because you're not inconvenienced, nor are the people who pay you to rape the planet of resources or pollute whatever remains.

In simple terms you're evil. In more complex ones, well, you're also evil because pretty much anyone who takes a job to deliberately fuck up the agency they work for and fuck over the people he's sworn to support is just simply evil.

It's a farce that you're in charge of "Environmental Protection" when your main goal is "Environmental Pillage".

I hate you Scott Pruitt and I'm not alone in my disgust. Shitbag.

Sep/05
2017

Ken Paxton didn't get swept away. He should have. Because he's filth.

Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, who led a group of Republican states in a threat to challenge Daca, applauded the president's decision.

"Had former President Obama’s unilateral order on Daca been left intact, it would have set a dangerous precedent, " Mr Paxton said in a statement. (BBC)

I'm unclear what the "dangerous precedent" is that Ken-tard is referring to. These are children and future contributors to the nation of immigrants called America. I'm equally unclear as to why it's a "good thing" to throw 800,000 young children out of the only home they know.

What IS clear is the hypocrisy when it comes to using children as a political tool, without any thought or honorable intention in mind: outlawing abortion is ok even though it produces unwanted babies who will be a burden on the state, damning living children to a life of poverty and hell in a land where they can't even speak the language is A-OK!

The GOP seems to love evil, probably because they love themselves and they love themselves some guns and money more than they love anything else. Their lack of civility, lack of compassion, lack of humanity is cloaked under religious and political rhetoric, justifying hatred and suffering by saying "god, law and the public approves."

Well fuckers god is a myth, law is what you make it and the public DOES NOT FUCKING APPROVE.

Horribad president continues to be horribad. And Ken-tard? When you wonder why your state doesn't have the manpower to clean up and repair over the years to come, I hope you remember the day celebrated today. I also hope the next hurricane drops a ten ton block of mud on your house.

FUCK tRUMP.

Sep/04
2017

American women have the right to abortion by law. But not in Kentucky.

LOUISVILLE, Ky. (AP) -- Its survival on the line, Kentucky's last abortion clinic is bracing for a pivotal legal showdown with health regulators and the state's anti-abortion governor that could determine whether Kentucky becomes the first state in the nation without an abortion clinic.

The licensing fight, set to play out in a Louisville federal courtroom starting Wednesday, revolves around a state law requiring that EMW Women's Surgical Center have agreements with a hospital and an ambulance service in the event of medical emergencies involving patients.

State regulators defend those conditions as "important safeguards" to protect women's health. The clinic in downtown Louisville counters that the requirements lack any "medical justification" and amount to an unconstitutional barrier to abortion.

Matt Bevin is the governor of the shitbag state of Kentucky. In the traditional tRump-equian manner women are being "protected" by deliberately denying them access to a service they are entitled to have.

As usual, to the pro-fuckhead crowd, the traditional WoS disclaimer: IF YOU DON'T LIKE ABORTION DON'T HAVE ONE, OTHERWISE MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS.

Any medical procedure can have complications, but you don't see dentists having to set up agreements with hospitals in case a patient has a negative reaction to anesthetic. I'm willing to bet that you can get a boob job, or hair implants easier in Kentucky than you can an abortion.

I'm fucking sick of bullshit religious, dogmatic, hate-fests that GOP legislatures use to crucify women with. In the event that a woman gets pregnant and doesn't want to be, the state has decided (and by state I mean the male-dominated legislators selected by a religious-voting electorate) that she must endure a forced pregnancy. And while you MIGHT think that a woman who wants an abortion would be lauded for saving the state money in taxes and services, instead she's punished because there MIGHT be complications.

Because being pregnant never has complications and neither does childbirth. It's just a fucking walk in the park.

So Matt, you fucking piece of shit scumbag, fuck you. And while I'm at it, fuck your whole misogynistic state. I hope you all choke on horse turds.

Aug/19
2017

Oh soooo scared of you.

Donald Trump's former chief strategist has vowed to go to war against the president's opponents, after being fired from his job at the White House.

teve Bannon, who has returned as head of ultra-conservative website Breitbart News, said he would fight for the agenda that won Mr Trump the election.

"I've got my hands back on my weapons," he said. "It's Bannon the Barbarian." (BBC)

I guess you were too barbaric for the Whitehouse eh? What, did they fire you for pissing in the plants? No, they fired you because you're confused and ineffective. Your message may have rallied a freakshow, clown-parade of piss-poor voters but it's not doing much to run this country.

Guess you didn't have what it takes eh?

So sure, go back and bitch on your website. I'm sure they'll be de-fucking-lighted to have you return. Wanna know the BEST thing about Breitbart? It's a honeypot for fucktards like you. So the rest of us don't have to read about your bullshit on legitimate ("Fake news to you") sites.

So here's the glove motherfucker: Dickhead Donald tRump is my opponent. Let's see what you got. Bring it Mr. Populist-Loser. Bring it.

Aug/17
2017

Joe Love is a fucking dick-brained asshole. The kind of asshole who flies a Nazi flag in front of his home in North Carolina. Why? Because in his words "this is Nazi fucking America."

Oh really? Well I have news for you Joe. It FUCKING ISN'T. And I would love, love, LOVE to see you take that Nazi flag and head right over to Arlington Cemetery and walk around with it. I DARE you to take that Nazi flag and stand on the side of a Veterans parade. I CHALLENGE you, fuck-face, to walk the streets of Manhattan on Hanukkah with that flag, in Times Square or Rockefeller Center with that flag.

I also suggest you pay up on your Obamacare because you're going to need medical help getting that flag out of your colon.

So listen Joe Ironically-Misnamed-Love: flying a Nazi flag means you're a fucking Nazi. You're a racist. You're a proponent of evil, hate and as un-American as Al Qaeda. It means you're terrorist. And you should be treated like one.

Good luck pin head. Because you're going to need one fucking hell of a lot of it in the future. Congratulations on your fame. It's going to haunt you. Probably forever.

Aug/13
2017

Dickhead isn't just a supporter to the angry-armed mob of white fascists, he's their god.

On Saturday, as Trump read slowly through a statement about the clashes that left dozens injured and one woman dead, he condemned hatred, bigotry and violence "on many sides." The president was silent when journalists asked whether he rejected the support of nationalist groups.

That silence was cheered by the white supremacist website Daily Stormer: "When asked to condemn, he just walked out of the room. Really, really good. God bless him." (AP)

There you go: The white right wants god to bless Dickhead Donald because he won't turn them away. These are the real Dickhead supporters, the ones who will follow and support him no matter what he says, does, did or will do.

Because he will let them hurt, threaten, abuse, menace and ultimately murder anyone who gets in their way. Or in Dickhead's way.

If Fucktard had a choice, THESE are the people he'd put in the senate, because fuck knows the House is already pretty damn close to these clowns.

Yes it's tRumpmerica, where being white, male and moneyed are the ONLY qualifications for citizenship. (Fine print: so long as you're Christian, not-sick, not educated, gun-loving and willing to look away from the pain and suffering of your fellow citizen, not to mention the world.)

tRump = hate. That's the bottom line.

Aug/12
2017

Dickhead's all "Oooh, I'm so surprised. Hugs anyone?"

President Donald Trump condemned "in the strongest possible terms this egregious display of hatred, bigotry, and violence on many sides".

"The hate and the division must stop right now," he told reporters, speaking in New Jersey, where he is on a working holiday. "We have to come together as Americans with love for our nation."[..]

Some observers also argue that Mr Trump's election to the White House re-energised the far right across the US. (BBC)

Who hated on immigrants? Who hated on women? Who hated on Hispanics, African-Americans and Muslims? Who made all these planks in his presidential campaign?

One guy. The guy who is now soooo astonished at the violence that came in his wake. YOU ARE the cause of all this hate mr. president, YOU'RE their hero. They may not have the money for people to write them speeches, to wear nice clothes or force-feed the press state-sponsored rhetoric, but they can do their best to imitate your worst.

And those are your "strong supporters" there Dickhead. Look in the mirror, their image is right there behind your big ugly mush. It's your party now fuckwad. Aren't you proud?

Aug/11
2017

And *I* don't think that anyone who is against old, white, asshole, conservative fucktards getting it up should pay for their prostrate exams or viagra either.

Aug. 10 (UPI) -- Texas lawmakers this week approved a bill that would require women to pay a separate health insurance premium to get coverage for elective abortions.

The bill will not allow exemptions for cases of fetal abnormalities, rape or incest, reported the Texas Tribune. It passed on a 95-51 vote Tuesday.

The bill's author, Republican state Rep. John Smithee, said abortion foes shouldn't contribute to abortion costs when they pay their health insurance bills to private health insurers.[..]

Democratic state Rep. Chris Turner said forcing women to pay extra to be covered in the case of a rape-induced pregnancy amounts to "rape insurance."

"Women don't plan to be raped. Parents don't plan for their children to be victims of incest," he said. "Asking a woman or a parent to foresee something like that and buy supplemental insurance to cover that horrific possibility is not only ridiculous, it is cruel."

Democratic State Rep. Donna Howard asked Smithee whether a 10-year-old girl who became pregnant after a rape should be forced to pay extra for health insurance, or go through with the pregnancy.

"We're discussing taking the life of the innocent little baby because of something the baby had nothing to do with," Smithee said, according to The Dallas Morning News.

Like that? Hey John Smithee (smithiee? smitey? schmucky? nah let's just go with fucking-assfaced-dickmunch-scumbag-womanhater), pardon let's use your NEW name: Hey Fucking-assfaced-dickmunch-scumbag-womanhater, you thought you were sooooo smart right? Because you're not denying women abortions, you're merely trying as hard as you can to make it as difficult as possible.

Also, an embryo isn't an "innocent little baby" shit head. It's an embryo. And women's bodies are THEIRS, not yours. Also you're going to lose that one in court because it's discriminatory to women to force them to carry an additional financial burden which only THEY have to have. Basically a womb-tax, for the crime of being able to get pregant.

So fuck you. Fuck your misogyny. Fuck your double standard. Fuck your intent to repress women and impose your own standard on what they can and can't do. Fuck you sideways with a rusty spoon which, hopefully, will get wedged, for putting further constraints on the poorest women who need the most help, not judgement, not forced pregnancy, not an end to their future, not a permanent memory of a CHOICE they are legally entitled to make.

Fuck you right to hell John fucking-assfaced-dickmunch-scumbag-womanhater Smithee. Oh, and have a nice day.

Aug/09
2017

Meet Ron. He just re-defined what an asshole is.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- Sen. Ron Johnson suggested that fellow Republican Sen. John McCain's brain tumor and the after-midnight timing of the vote were factors in the Arizona lawmaker's decisive vote against the GOP health care bill.[..] "He has a brain tumor right now. That vote occurred at 1:30 in the morning. Some of that might have factored in," Wisconsin's Johnson said.

Well the GOP certainly headed right from the high points of Roman-esque glory right into the post-Nero conflagration. It's hard to believe that ANYONE would be so fucking disrespectful to a colleague. It's simply breathtaking. I would even go so far as to say that McCain even dead and zombified has more character, courage and capability than R-tard Ron.

Hey Ron. You suck. And you're an asshole. Gratz!

Aug/09
2017

He's got AC and unlimited beverages served on a silver platter. For the rest of the nation? Not so much...

Trump, who has called climate change a "total con job" and "hoax" perpetrated to harm U.S. economic competitiveness, has spearheaded a wholesale scrapping of Obama-era initiatives that sought to reduce carbon emissions from coal-fired power plants and other sources. Last week, Trump's administration formally told the United Nations that the U.S. intends to pull out of the international climate accord signed in 2015, in which nearly 200 nations pledged to reduce carbon emissions. (AP)

On the other hand, the people who stand to lose the most and suffer the most are located in the parts of the nation that were solidly for this shitbag. So. Let's see how that works out for them and theirs huh?

Jul/28
2017

I love this quote regarding the GOP on their attempts to re-write or re-whatever the ACA...

That prompted Democratic Sen. Chris Murphy to tweet: "Seriously, this is weapons grade bonkers. 3 Senators just announced they will vote for repeal only if assured it will never become law. (AP)

So let me get this straight, the GOP senators merely want to go on RECORD as voting yes so they can SAY they did something, but they're totally against the results of what they're voting for.

Well, tRump sure brought the stupid to the GOP and it looks like they're pretty much stuck with it. Kinda like the taxpayers are being stuck with over a billion for the "wall".

Great job guys, great fucking job.

Jul/27
2017

Scaramouche defended his boss by saying "Dickhead's [sic] not elite... he's pizza and cheese burgers." I wasn't aware that eating those things disqualifies you from the title of "elite".

Because he loves to chow down on delicious pizza and hamburgers, President Donald Trump is certainly not a member of the “elite” and can relate to the common man. At least that’s what new White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci claimed to a befuddled and questioning BBC reporter. (Newsweek)

So message to the world's elite out there: Spit out that burger! Stick your nose in the air when your limo drives by a pizza joint! The Man Has Spoken and the rule is now that you're NOT allowed to eat those things much less ENJOY them!

On the other hand, if eating those things (in the White House, hand-made, to order, whenever and wherever you like, on fine china with expensive beverages) denotes that you're not elitist then what do we call the people who cook and serve those for a living?

Oh yeah. Immigrants.

Jul/26
2017

I support LBGT.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Donald Trump abruptly declared a ban Wednesday on transgender troops serving anywhere in the U.S. military, catching the Pentagon flat-footed and unable to explain what it called Trump's "guidance." His proclamation, on Twitter rather than any formal announcement, drew bipartisan denunciations and threw currently serving transgender soldiers into limbo.

"Please be advised that the United States Government will not accept or allow Transgender individuals to serve in any capacity in the U.S. Military," the commander in chief tweeted.

Trump wrote that he had consulted with "my generals and military experts," but he did not mention Defense Secretary Jim Mattis, the retired Marine general who less than one month ago told the military service chiefs to spend another six months weighing the costs and benefits of allowing transgender individuals to enlist

Let's be clear:

  • Dickhead NEVER consulted with anyone, his statement is just another pathological lie
  • Trans troops exist, have existed and will continue to exist and do their job alongside their peers
  • "Hours of sensitivity training" as decried by shithead, religious fundies supports ALL non-white, non-male members of the armed forces and CONTINUES to be essential
  • Dickbag has the attention span of an amoeba and the intelligence of nearly the same, this is just another pretty distraction that caught his minuscule attention and aids NO one, except his freakshow followers

I do congratulate Dickhead in one area: consistency. He does manage to meet or exceed the WORST things imaginable. And many that are unimaginable too.

Jul/22
2017

Title brought to you by the Office of Redundancy Department.

A Florida man told police he "went bananas" after workers from a utility company parked their vehicles in front of his driveway while they carried out repair work. (BBC)

Florida. Guns. Assholes. These things add up to pure stupidity in its most refined form. Gunzerker was mad because a utility truck was in front of his driveway, but instead of using his words he just went out and shot the trucks. Because. This was WHILE the workmen were still trying to fix the issue that probably affected him as well.

His excuse? "He went bananas." Lovely. Lives are at risk and the only rationale is that a truck in front of your house makes you crazy.

Guns are bad. Fucking idiots with guns are lethal. Legality has nothing to do with it when people find it so easy to lose their temper and do asinine shit. It's not like you're going to overthrow anything with your damn guns anyway. All you're going to do is kill people because you went "bananas".

Jul/20
2017

Slavery and legal abortion? Both tragedies to the GOP. Except in the case of slavery it's not really that bad because slaves had it "better" back then. Women are trash who are less than slaves and only good beating and screwing. They have no place in politics, science or deciding their own future.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- The Senate has confirmed a Kentucky lawyer who equated abortion with slavery - calling them the "two greatest tragedies in our country" - to a lifetime appointment as a federal judge.

On a vote of 51-47, the Senate backed John Bush to serve on the Cincinnati-based 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals despite strong opposition from Democrats who said his blog posts under a pseudonym disqualified him.

Sen. Al Franken of Minnesota argued that Bush's writings made him "uniquely unqualified for the job."

But Bush was strongly supported by fellow Kentuckian Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, who lectured Franken on the Senate floor.

McConnell called Bush "a man of integrity and considerable ability" and said that Franken needed to "think a little harder" before describing Bush as out of bounds.

Actually Mitch, you shriveled, turkey-necked, dick-faced tool, Al wasn't out of line at all. Appointing a total fuckwad who avows to represent ONLY men, with ONLY contempt for women is NOT representative of qualified judiciary. That you would support someone who is as clearly misogynistic and biased to a lifetime role just demonstrates your complete lack of support for women.

GOP war on women? Yes. It's a thing. And Mitch is happy to be the standard bearer for the part that hates. Fuck you Mitch, fuck you and your tiny, shriveled, dick-brain.