Turn Right, 100 yards....

05/29/08

Permalink 07:15:19 am, by Roulette Email , 272 words, 141 views   English (US)
Categories: Daily Life

Turn Right, 100 yards....

Ah the conveniences of modern life. Cell phones to talk to people anywhere. Computers to shop anywhere. GPS units to give us directions to anywhere.

So, picture a woman driving in the right lane of a 2 lane highway, approaching a intersection. Suddenly, she slows down to a crawl. Traffic begins to pile up behind her. She flips on her left hand turn signal. Oh. Simple enough, right? She wants to make a left at the intersection. Two problems. First, going left would be the wrong way on very busy one way street. Two, there is significant traffic passing her in the left lane.

Halfway through the intersection, she stops, and tries to force her car in the way so she can make a left. Once she's about 45 degrees into the turn, she has a realization. I'm not sure what sparked it, but it looks like she finally realizes what she did wrong. She whips her car out of the left hand turn, and finally takes the right.

Sadly, I know why she did it. I could see it sitting on her dashboard. She was too busy listening to her GPS system tell her to turn right that she forgot which direction she was supposed to turn.

Here's a little hint, easy to do while you're driving even. Extend your index finger and thumb on both hands so the index finger points up, and the thumb points to the side. Look at the shape they make. The one that looks like an L... is left. The other one is right. Remember that, and you'll never get outsmarted by your GPS system again.

Fuckchop.

Comments, Pingbacks:

Comment from: Larathiel [Visitor] Email
You know, the first time I ran into an adult who couldn't remember their left from their right, I thought it was odd. However, in the 15 years since then, I've met a great many otherwise intelligent adults who simply can't tell left from right, particularly when driving.

I suspect that it's some sort of spatial disorder rather than actual idiocy. As an analogy, consider someone whose eyes don't work in stereo and therefore lack depth perception. My theory is that this is similar only psychological and along the X axis rather than the Y axis...

One thing I found helpful with the first person I met who had this problem (it was my first GF actually) was calling out directions as "Driver Side" or "Passenger Side". Such an option on a GPS unit might benefit such folks. Mind You, I'm not sure how that explains how she still to this day can tell someone, "Take I-76 East until You hit Route 1..." When the driver in question is already east of said junction by many miles.

*ring* *ring*

Me: Hey, why am I heading over the Walt Whitman Bridge?
Her: I don't know, why *are* You heading over the Walt Whitman Bridge?
Me: Hey remember that time You gave my Dad and I directions on how to get to Charlotte from Asheville, and when we followed Your directions we ended up in Georgia.
Her: ...
Me: Yeah, I'm going to be a bit late...

*sigh*

Thank God my phone has Google Maps...
PermalinkPermalink 05/29/08 @ 07:39
Comment from: odessa [Member] Email
I am left / right impaired - but I also don't use a GPS. Don't trust them. I would rather do it the old fashioned way and *gasp* look at a map.
PermalinkPermalink 05/29/08 @ 19:01
Comment from: u235 [Member] Email
I had to travel to DC recently. At night. And go to fucking gods-knows-where. The best thing I did that night was rent a GPS along with the car.

Now honestly it was my first GPS experience. But I'd figured (quite correctly) that because it was dark and I hadn't a fucking clue as to where to go it would be a good idea. Indeed it turned out to be.

However, the GPS showed with a HUGE fucking arrow which way to turn (even when it wasn't screaming at me TURNNOWTURNNOWTURNNOW)all I had to do was *look* at the fucking map and it showed me arrow-right or arrow-left. Simple really. And in places where I couldn't turn (due to road work, traffic or just my wanting to go to a gas station) the unit would just *recalculate* and give me new directions.

Thanks, but I prefer not to get killed taking a ramp that's boarded up with **DANGER** posted all over. I'll just drive on and find another route... k'thx.
PermalinkPermalink 05/29/08 @ 22:46

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Rou

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