Rou

I’ve commented before on my hatred for ad campaigns. In nearly any given commercial break, you’ll hear a stupid ad. It’s like clockwork. After reading a recent thread on another forum, and blatantly ripping off some of their examples, let me take a few pot shots at some of the ads on the air.

First and foremost is this one god awful SUV commercial. It features a man kissing his wife good bye, walking down the walkway, and jumping off the mesa they apparently build the house on. Of course, he opens up his parachute (because he’s EXTREME!) and lands in the rocky valley, gets into his SUV and drives off. Ok, the obvious question is how the fuck does he get home? Followed by why the fuck would you build a house there and why the fuck would anyone living there go to work in a suit and tie? But think about this for a second… if the SUV was that great, shouldn’t they have it parked on top of the mesa next to the house instead of stuck down in the valley? Huh? Huh? Think about it.

The next example is an older ad for some shampoo or another. Woman is in a airplane bathroom, washing her hair, apparently going orgasmic over it, and accidentally presses the intercom so the entire airplane can hear her. Couple problems here. First… why the fuck would you wash your hair on a plane. Second, have you SEEN the airplane bathrooms? There is barely enough room for you, let alone the gesticulations required to wash your hair in there. Finally, what the fuck is the purpose of an intercom in the bathroom on an airplane??? Anyone?

This next one is a cell phone ad. Two parents and two kids in the mall. Dad says that they will split up shopping. And in order to get back together, Dad will call Bobby, Bobby will call Mom, Mom will call Sue and then they will meet back here. Of course, it turns out that none of them owns a cell phone. It makes me want to kill everyone involved in the ad honestly. Writers, actors, agency. All of them. It assumes a level of mind numbing idiocy that not only kills my inner child… it confirms the theory that cell phones cause brain cancer.

Next up are Burger Kings ads. Now, they started out with just a kinda creepy guy with a big head who showed up and made you want fast food. But now, I think the ad agency is cashing in on the fact that everyone finds him to be overwhelmingly creepy. There really isn’t a true flaw that can be pointed at like my other examples. Just that I don’t see how making your customers uncomfortable really helps sell burgers.

Drug ads are always amusing in a semi-twisted kinda way. I don’t know what medication it was for. Drug ads crack me up anyway, but this one had some 'special' side effects. “Side effects may include dizziness, drowsiness and diarrhea.” Think about that for a second, and ponder this… what if you get all three? Nuff said.

Finally, I have another fast food faux pas. McDonalds went out and decided to improve their coffee. They partnered with some coffee company and all and now their coffee is allegedly improved. The ad? “Finally… McDonalds has good coffee”. What the hell. You’re not supposed to admit that you’ve been giving us crap for decades. What the hell kind of thing is that. “Man, we fucked you over for years, but now it’s good so give us money”. Hell, everyone know their coffee was a far cry from good, but admitting it is hardly going to make me try your new and improved blend, now is it?!

There are some very good ads out there. Some sell their products well. Others amuse you enough to remember their products. I still laugh at some of the great dot com ads from back in the day. But some of the ads out there make me remember the products in a bad way, and somehow, I don’t think that’s what they want.