Rou

Jack Thompson. The name is an expletive. There are few people on earth I find more repugnant or repulsive. I could spend full days crafting curses and vile caricatures in an attempt to encompass him. But nothing I could say would come close.

What? You’ve never heard of him? You probably have, but the name is easily forgotten. The mind naturally attempts to seal out wretchedness in an attempt to preserve sanity. Even if you know the name, you're probably unaware of the extent of his crimes. Allow me to enlighten you about this blight on humanity.

First off, he’s a Florida lawyer, which is the first strike IMO. Worse yet, he’s a lawyer with political aspirations. That’s two. And that’s all before we get to the heart of the matter.

You see, he has a problem. He considers free speech to be a problem. Well, not his free speech, but everyone else’s speech at least. Let’s look back over his career.

1988 was the year. In his zealous pursuit of restricted speech, he came before the Florida Supreme court. For reasons that have never been released to the public, he was required to undergo psychiatric testing. He was the lawyer here. Not a defendant or witness. THE FUCKING LAWYER! He passed but his later actions indicate that he cheated somehow because this boy is c-r-a-z-y.

At roughly the same time, he challenged Janet Reno in a State Attorney election. He made hundreds of wild and exaggerated claims about her sexuality, and followed those up with statements about mental disorders. For the next 10 years (long after the election), he hounded her by repeatedly released statements accusing her of being blackmailed by a lesbian conspiracy. There aren’t even words.

What was next for slime boy? 2 Live Crew. Many of you remember the album and the controversy. ‘As Nasty as They Wanna Be.’ He was the fuckhead who managed to successfully get the artists slapped down as obscenity, though the ruling was reversed.

Next up, he continued on the attack of free speech. You see, he’s also the guy that targeted Ice T’s song 'Cop Killer.' Another partial victory for him, as the artist was dropped from his label in response to shithead’s actions. At this point, he actually got an award and was PROUD of it. The ACLU declared him a ‘Top Ten Censor.’ He has publicly called it a badge of honor. As I said, human filth. But we’re not done. Not by a long shot.

In 1999, he set out against the entertainment industry more fully. At this point, he once again raised the all important ‘THINK OF THE CHILDREN’ Banner. He sued a number of companies on behalf of the victims of a 1997 school shooting. Once again, the case was dismissed, but Jack’s never been one to let something like the law or the Constitution stop him. He continued his assault and began making up shit that sounded good. He complained about God-mode in games that didn’t have it. He said the Halo sniper rifle prepared kids to be the next Beltway Sniper (which we all know isn’t true because the gun was shit). Columbine was just more fuel for his fodder. He worked very hard to blame the actions of the killers on Doom, despite there being no evidence to support the position. It should be noted that the media bought his idiotic claims at the time.

Around this time he discovered Grand Theft Auto. The game was tailor made for him. He attacked it often and loudly, and pushed parents groups to boycott stores that sold it, saying it taught the kids all kinds of bad things. Once again, it should be noted that the game has always been clearly marked ‘M for Mature’. But, fuck nugget really never lets things like that get in his way. But hey, at least he finally made a good point. The game is not for children. Which is why they're not supposed to buy it.

But before he let that tiny bit of logic go to his head, he found a new target in the video game world. Another smut peddling game of epic proportions. The SIMS! I can’t even begin to describe the lunacy this man must be afflicted with. He made a number of false and slanderous claims about the games built in code. There is a certain joy here though. The source of his claims? A GTA modder who fed him bogus info to see if he would attack even the most wholesome of games. Jack Thompson, sludge to the core, has never backed off his claims. Probably still believes it.

He did however, target GTA again. The Hot Coffee mod, was another of his babies. This was another notch on his belt. He managed to have the game re-rated AO, despite there being no good reason to do so. Loathsome worm. No, wait. That’s being too harsh… to worms.

All of this is leading up to the reason I’m ranting against him now. I know, I know, it’s a really fucking long intro. Sue me. The man is really fucked up.

In what I can only describe a bastardization of Jonathan Swift’s ‘A Modest Proposal’, Jack Thompson has laid out his ‘A Modest Video Game Proposal’. The gist of which is that he will give ten thousand dollars to charity if a game designer creates, publishes and sells a game where the main plot character is a father who takes revenge on the video game industry for training the kid that killed his son. The eye rolling icons can’t even begin to start in on this concept. On top of the idiocy involved in the idea… ten grand? What the fuck? This guy should put up millions if he wants anyone to take him serious. $10k is pocket change in a game development project. On top of that, he’s advocating a game that is EXACTLY like the games he so blindly attacks. He can’t even follow is own fucking train of thought. How the fuck are we supposed to?

Jack is an idiot. He likes the idea of free speech, but not the practice of it. He wants everyone to live in a happy Chutes & Ladders world. He too fucking feebleminded to understand that world doesn’t work that way. The scary part is that he really believes it. He defends it vehemently. He’s so daft that he doesn’t accept PROOF that he’s wrong. He misinterprets anything he can to put a slam on the entertainment industry. All because he doesn’t like what other people do with their ability to express themselves.

Jack Thompson is human refuse. A cyst on humanity. A tool of the worst kind. I hope hell has a place warmed up for him, because he certainly doesn’t have any place here on earth. I can only hope that he dies in a fire, and continue to burn for eternity. In other words... I don't like him very much.