Archives for: "June 2009"

Jun/30
2009
SHANGHAI (AP) — The buying and selling of the make-believe currencies used in online gaming has become so widespread that Chinese authorities fear it will affect the real economy. Fascinating really. China is so worried about teh intarwebz that they… more »
Jun/30
2009
From news.com.au A FRENCH Guiana court has jailed four church members for up to 12 years for the exorcism of an epileptic teenager who was found dead attached to a cross. The members of the Celestial Church of Christ were jailed yesterday for terms of… more »
Jun/29
2009

Too Little Too Late

Ruth Madoff Says She Feels 'Betrayed and Confused' (AP) Am I the only one having trouble swallowing this schlock? I mean come on honey, can't you do better? She claims she cries herself to sleep, uh yeah - considering they took 80 mil and only left you… more »
Jun/29
2009
I find you can categorize drivers into two types - ones who can tolerate more than a foot of space between their hood and the back of the car in front... and the ones who can't. It's a tough call sometimes, because in my state even an inch of free space… more »
Jun/28
2009
I wonder, really, if spokes people get enough money to help them say stupid stuff with a straight face. Take this one for example: ''These laws are common sense,'' said NRA spokeswoman Rachel Parsons. ''Restaurants are not immune to criminal activity.… more »
Jun/27
2009
Drink. Ok, ok that's the cop-out answer. But before we go on let me fill you in on the backstory. So I teach stuff part time, it doesn't pay gobs of dough but it pays a little and I get to do something I like. Partly it's an act of devotion by a… more »
Jun/26
2009
SHELBYVILLE, Tenn. (AP) -- Authorities said a couple got into a fight using Cheetos. The Bedford County Sheriff's Department said a 40-year-old man and 44-year-old woman became involved in a 'verbal altercation.' Somehow, the orange puffy snacks were… more »
Jun/26
2009
A lot of celebrities have died recently - David Carradine, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett. Then Michael Jackson dies and eclipses the lot of them. Personally, I think these were all entertainment icons in their own right - all deserving appropriate… more »
Jun/25
2009
Why do we care? Ok let me rephrase that, because I know I don't really care. Why do other people care if some politician cheated on his wife? Humans aren't 100% loyal. Not sports fans, not senators, not friends, not even your spiritual leader can be… more »
Jun/24
2009
Its been a bad week for you, Mr. Hilton. First, you get punched in the eye by Black Eyed Pea's manager, Polo Molina. Then your gay brothers' feathers were ruffled by you calling Will.I.Am a "faggot". Not a good week at all. Here is the deal, Mr. Hilton:… more »
Jun/24
2009
... she's their Queen! FORT SMITH, Ark. (AP) -- A mother who drank 13 beers before a psychological evaluation failed to recover custody of her three young children despite claiming she wasn't drunk because she ''can drink like a fish.'' Amazing.… more »
Jun/24
2009

Bienvenue à New York!

So how exactly do you say "Sit down, buckle up, hold on and please quit screaming" in french? Good question, although I don't think anyone asked it at the time. NEW YORK (AP) -- Five French tourists got a harrowing start to their New York visit: a wild… more »
Jun/23
2009
What do you call students who voice a silent protest in support of their teachers at graduation? I call them kids with a conscience, their school didn't agree and withheld their diplomas as a punishment. LOS ANGELES (AP) -- The Los Angeles school… more »
Jun/22
2009
PRESCOTT, Ariz. (AP) -- Two teenage friends playing a game of ''car tag'' were arrested after a sheriff's deputy spotted them driving erratically. Yavapai County sheriff's spokesman Dwight D'Evelyn said the deputy saw a Chevrolet truck driving just one… more »
Jun/22
2009
CAIRO (AP) -- Amateur video of a young Iranian woman lying in the street -- blood streaming from her nose and mouth -- has quickly become an iconic image of the country's opposition movement and unleashed a flood of outrage at the regime's crackdown. In… more »
Jun/22
2009
The Supreme Court decided that if Mr. and Mrs. Feelgood don't like the publicly available programs for their special needs kid they aren't compelled to see if it really benefits their child. Ok, that's fine I buy that because mainstreaming doesn't… more »
Jun/21
2009

Do Not...

Do not, under any circumstances, no matter how compelling you might find them to be: Pat me on the head, unless you wish to lose the entire hand below the wrist Talk to any portion of my anatomy other than my face Push at me an item to be cleaned,… more »
Jun/20
2009
English. It means a few things, in particular the language that Americans and British speak (although I guess they invented it, we just took it with us). It's a connotation (to call something English as opposed to say French or Greek). It's also what we… more »
Jun/19
2009
I love the Associated Press. Every time the NYTimes pulls their link off the front page I kick up a fit. I mean how can you NOT love it with headlines like this one? Gov. Schwarzenegger's Testicle Sculpture a Flop Really. It brings tears to my eyes.… more »
Jun/18
2009
Once again it's the case where the lazy-ass-fucking-moron-bird gets the worm and the hard-working-smart-bird gets shit. I'm talking about people who thought it was a "good idea" to buy monster trucks and SUVs that got shitty mileage and are now stuck… more »
Jun/18
2009
I hate the "new" era of management. In the old days I had a boss who just xeroxed the first review he ever wrote for me and submitted it with a raise to HR. I'd figure out he'd submitted it because suddenly my pay stub would be a few dollars higher.… more »
Jun/17
2009
He brought home an assignment to write about a life changing event. That doesn't seem so bad even when you tack on all the extras: choose a famous quote to support you, choose a plant (yes plant) that fits with the theme, write a paper on the topic,… more »
Jun/16
2009
I'm guessing they can write their own punchline to this one: "To guys with guns go into a bar and get drunk. One of them picks a fight. Guess what happens next?" PHOENIX (AP) -- The Arizona Senate has reversed itself and voted to allow people with… more »
Jun/16
2009
Forward - MeMe Roth is on a mission. Junk food is evil, and not just plain, vanilla evil, all that yummy stuff is on par with the anti-Christ. She wants to purge it from her children's' school, but if she can't purge it, she can just harangue and harass… more »
Jun/15
2009
Municipalities (insert taxpayers) spend millions for stadiums and arenas to attract professional sports teams. Many players get paid obscene amounts of money. Although the taxpayers heavily subsidize the venues most these primadonnas play in, many can… more »
Jun/15
2009
I was about to write a rant lambasting people who abort girl fetuses when I suddenly realized that I'm pro-choice. Here's the full article that fueled my initial irked-ness: U.S. Births Hint at Bias for Boys in Some Asians The trend is buried deep in… more »
Jun/14
2009
I can summarize this rant in just a few sentences, watch me: When Bush was in power Liberals and Moderates worked through the government and within our laws to make changes. They did not advocate violence, murder or destruction. Now that their… more »
Jun/13
2009
It's interesting to see how the Iranians are taking it now that claims of election fraud have sullied their "democratic" process. Once again a hardline hawk has been re-elected to a second term in a curry-flavored version of the Bush/Gore elections of… more »
Jun/13
2009
I read this little tidbit out of sheer boredom: Product Recall: Soft Mexican-Style Cheese(AP) The headline made me wonder a little what "Soft Mexican-Style Cheese" was so I read a bit fruther... Torres Hillsdale Country Cheese LLC, based in Reading,… more »
Jun/12
2009
That mean old Miss California USA organization de-crowned her because she is a christian. Poor, poor, baby, couldn't they see that you were doing God's work when you missed all those engagements or aligned yourself with organizations without discussing… more »
Jun/12
2009

Two Words

Brilliant Comrade. more »
Jun/11
2009
WASHINGTON (NYT) — As the health care debate heats up, the American Medical Association is letting Congress know that it will oppose creation of a government-sponsored insurance plan... Interesting. So the medical profession which professes to have our… more »
Jun/11
2009
I have a rental this week, a vehicle I would never even conceive of owning a Saturn SUV. On the surface there's no real issues, I mean when you get into the vehicle and just sit there. It's once you start driving the car you start to get a feel for… more »
Jun/10
2009
An 11-yr old girl, Ewelina Bledniak, is being told to go "back home" to Poland. If she goes voluntarily she can apply for the lengthy process to get back into the US or she can be deported and be barred from the US for 10yrs. Here's the rub - she's… more »
Jun/10
2009
Disregarding the fact that I can't even eat pizza due to dietary conflict I was drawn to the box due to the marketing copy on the side. "Enjoy your delicious moments!" The box made this pronouncement on two sides and the front which also sported the… more »
Jun/10
2009
...An easily accessible outlet. Regardless of if it's where you work, travel, visit or just pass by the standard wall plug is probably the modern equivalent of the smiley face. In airports people cluster around them, polite, sharing the wealth. When… more »
Jun/09
2009
If you are big enough and bad enough, evidently you can find out who that person is that unfavorably blogged about you and out them. Evidently, Ed Whelan is just that kind of person. He is a former Justice Antonin Scalia law clerk, a Bush Justice… more »
Jun/09
2009

Lost in the Bushes

So Texas is clearly proud of the fact that they had a president or two that came from this state. It's even better for their simple minds that both presidents were named the same (more or less). As a result every, and I mean fucking every goddamn road… more »
Jun/09
2009
I had to travel to Texas on American. They're the only carrier that will make the flight without stopovers, so really they're the only decent choice. The flight had arrived on time, and was ready to board on schedule, but apparently the pilot was overly… more »
Jun/09
2009

Body Snatchin' 101

So let's see... you have two kids and want a third do you a) get knocked up the old fashioned way b) look into adoption or c) cut the fetus out of another woman... I think you know the answer to this one. The 27-year-old is charged with killing her… more »
Jun/08
2009
BEIJING — China has issued a sweeping directive requiring all personal computers sold in the country to include sophisticated software that can filter out pornography and other “unhealthy information” from the Internet. The software, which manufacturers… more »
Jun/08
2009
Everyone knows child porn is illegal, meaning against the law, meaning if you get caught with it you're going to jail. One douchebag, Kenneth Sodomsky (if that even is his real name) doesn't dispute that he had it on his computer, he's debating the fact… more »
Jun/07
2009
I train people to do stuff. Physical stuff that involves learning coordination and timing. If you screw up badly enough you can hurt people other than yourself, in over a decade of teaching that's never happened on my watch, but it can happen and it has… more »
Jun/06
2009
The Shady Lady Ranch is looking for a couple of good men. In this crappy economy the pleasure business is having a tough time, so some want to look outside the current model - you know the one where hot chicks give men a good time. Heidi Fleiss tried… more »
Jun/05
2009

GO AWAY

I recently got a new job after a couple months of job seeking. Yay me, right? I thought so too. Life has been good. Apparently, I'm popular all of the sudden. I thought I had deactivated all of my online resume's or indicated that I was no longer… more »
Jun/05
2009
I did my bit. I said my piece. I was done with it. Until you opened your dumbass mouth. Mr Roeder, the murdering bastard who killed the abortion doctor, is upset. You see, he's mad that he's being treated as a criminal. He's also mad that people are… more »
Jun/02
2009
You know I actually remember getting a real, honest to goodness, xeroxed chain letter gods-the-fuck-only-knows how long ago. It was rather different back then, prior to email (yes humans did know how to write and communicate long distances back then and… more »
Jun/01
2009

Vigilantes

Man murders abortion doctor. I could do a million and one rants about the scum sucker and people that support / approve of them. Easy to do. Dime a dozen. I kinda hope u235 does because I know it'll be given the appropriate level of vitriol. I'm going… more »
Jun/01
2009
So Mother-Sow has landed herself a TV deal. Gee whodathunkit? LOS ANGELES (AP) -- The Southern California woman who gave birth to the world's longest-surviving set of octuplets has signed a deal to star in a reality television series, her lawyer said… more »
Jun/01
2009

Quite the Headline

Family Axes Wedding Plans, Egyptian Cuts Off Penis By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS Published: May 31, 2009 Well, if you want to make a statement, that certainly does it. When refused permission to marry the woman he wanted (from a lower caste) this… more »