World of Suck

Abstinence, the dysfunctional solution to teen-pregnancy, is back in the news. This time with a bouncy Harvard student who feels compelled to tell everyone why she's frigid. Ok, well it's super that you found a solution in throwing away the prettiest and most attractive years of your life because you don't want sex, but being a poster-girl for bullshit like: "abstinence makes for better marital-sex", or "it improves your health is"... just that bullshit. Personally I'd love to see how a lack of experience makes you a better lover. I suppose if you're marrying some fumble-fingered virgin guy you'll both be excited enough to cream your pants just undressing for the first time, but trust me, that's not "good" sex.

On one hand I don't understand why these sexless-evangelicals can't just go about being abstinent silently. On the other hand, I'm very glad they don't, because it gives me something to laugh about.

"virginity is extremely alluring, though its mysterious allure . . . is not rooted in an image of innocence and purity, but rather in the notion of strength." As she told me later, "It takes a strong woman to be abstinent, and that’s the sort of woman I want to be."

Here - let me sum it up in one word: "Spinster".

Honey, you're really narrowing your field by limiting yourself to men who haven't had sex in their lives (or so they may claim). Part of growing up is developing your skills with the opposite gender, kissing, cuddling and yes, learning how to make-love with a degree of skill.

If you want to pass that up, fine, be our guest, but please... don't think you're unique or special. And by the way, hon? Oral sex is called oral sex for a reason, even if you choose to think of it otherwise. Still that might be the one saving grace for the abstinence followers: "Abstinence - you may be a lousy fuck but boy can you give great head."

I don't get it. How goddamn lazy can a person be that they can't turn their engine off while fueling their car? There are stickers on every pump that state in bold lettering: 1. Do Not Smoke and 2. Shut Off Engine. If you managed to turn your car on to get it to the pump, I imagine you should be able to restart it to leave.

It's a safety issue, more from the point of accidentally knocking your car into gear than blowing something up from a spark, but still... You're not saving yourself any time, realistically speaking, by leaving your car running while fueling.

Why can't people fucking shut off their ignition while gassing up their cars?