Apr/19
2014

The mom was clearly out of it: "I wonder why he's like that?" she asked. Everyone in the room wanted to point and shriek "Because you fucking SUCK as a parent you stupid bitch!"

This wasn't little Damien's first trip to get his hair cut, but it might be his last at least at this place.

The hairdresser was trying very politely to say "You need to take your fucking misbehaved brat-hole elsewhere," but the lady with the frizzy hair in yoga capri pants with the glowing neon sneakers just stared blankly, drool nearly dribbling out the corner of her mouth. The words were aimed at her but not sinking in. Husband-unit was equally useless, it was pretty apparent where the shrieking, spitting, hitting, flailing spawn of satan had come from.

"Take him to the park", mom was ordering dad who balked.
"Why?" Junior, probably about six was standing numbly in the middle of the room ignoring everything but the lolly jammed in his mouth. Mom didn't want him with her and neither did Dad, for good reason. Mom was going to get "her" time now after not being around while the mayhem was happening. Now she wanted Dad, who probably suffered the brunt of the chaos to do yeoman service, to take the kids away and clear up the awkward.
"Take him to Brockton," she says while smiling at the tiny piranha with neatly cut hair. (This town is like 30 miles away.) "Oh and wake up his brother."
"Why?" Again, and then not waiting for an answer "I'm not taking him there." Dad stalks off in a huff.

The hairdresser spends a little more time with Mom trying to get it through her daft head that her child's behavior was NOT appropriate, NOT appreciated and NOT going to be tolerated another time. (She deserved a medal in my opinion for putting up with it once, not to mention giving the little scum a second chance.)

Mom's only response was "I wonder why he's like that?"

Really some people shouldn't reproduce once, much less twice. If you can't fucking control your kid DO NOT expect society to do it for you. As for the hairdresser I wish her luck and an iron will the next time this bitch comes back begging. A six dollar tip just ain't worth the trouble.

Apr/18
2014

This time of year many parents or other adults will give a child a bunny. Please stop.

Bunnies and chicks (and puppies and kittens) are living creatures. They need food, water, a reasonably clean place to sleep and a place to go to the bathroom. They feel pain and they can be injured by inexperienced little hands.

So unless you, as supposedly responsible adult, are willing to spend time with your child making sure that your child does not hurt the bunny and teach your child that the bunny and all animals feel pain and need care just like they do, make theirs bunny chocolate.

And if your child gets hurt by an animal you brought home, don't blame the animal, go find a mirror. That is who you should blame 99% of the time because an animal, whether it is a rabbit, a chicken, a cat or a dog, is just being an animal and usually only hurts its human companions when reacting to pain or fear. It is rarely something that a smart human shouldn't be able to think ahead of. (Yes, occasionally there is something not quite right with an animal, but it is rare)

So PLEASE say "No" to that fuzzy, warm Easter Bunny, unless you're ready for a long commitment to its well being.

Apr/17
2014

A formal study merely confirms what we all know as true: money and business rules this nation. "We the People" don't exist, it's "We the Rich" and everyone else is just dog poo.

A new study from Princeton and Northwestern Universities concluded that the U.S. government represents not the interests of the majority of citizens but those of the rich and powerful.[..]

"The central point that emerges from our research is that economic elites and organized groups representing business interests have substantial independent impacts on US government policy, while mass-based interest groups and average citizens have little or no independent influence.?(UPI)

It's grim when you read it in print, but deep down everyone knows this. The problem is that those in power have the banners of "nationalism" and "religion" on their side and don't hesitate to lie in the name of those things. Even during the worst most egregious times the power-makers and deal-brokers have gotten away with all they could lay their hands on.

Enron, the bank and car manufacturer bailout, the creepy Koch brothers, we KNOW who the actors are, we KNOW how they work and still it goes on. Blithering idiots willing to give their votes to politicians who have no interest in the health and welfare of the masses, only in the checkbooks who can keep their asses in power.

Some will say "So what? I still have my free speech, I still have my guns and my rights" and those people are the same narrow-minded fools who don't believe in that Global Warming will hurt us or that fossil fuels will some day run out.

The report consoles that ?Americans do enjoy many features
central to democratic governance, such as regular elections, freedom of speech and association? but goes on to warn that ?we believe that if policymaking is dominated by powerful business organizations and a small number of affluent Americans, then America?s claims to being a democratic society are seriously threatened.?

For those of too low an IQ to get the message there let me state it simply: "You have your rights for NOW but should those in power choose to take it away they can." Jim Crow laws? Yes, they're back. And while it might target someone poorer or older or more disadvantaged than you right now but it won't stay that way. Guaranteed.

Apr/16
2014

Nothing like a shriveled up twat trying to tell young women what to expect for their future...

WASHINGTON, April 16 (UPI) -- Conservative activist Phyllis Schlafly wrote an op-ed in the Christian Post saying if women are paid as much as men, they will not be able to find husbands.

A week after Republicans blocked an effort in the Senate to vote on the Paycheck Fairness Act, Schlafy, an opponent of the Equal Rights Amendment, wrote Tuesday that it would only make finding a "suitable mate" harder.

Phyllis, Phyllis, Phyllis. You know no one calls their kid Phyllis any more and probably for good reason. The name conjures up dried apricots flapping together making horrible screeching noises like farts out of a desiccated mummy's twat. Smegmella still hasn't learned to shut her fucking yap, defending the continued inequality in the name of conservative principles.

Of all the stupid fucking moronic things to say: "Of course women should make less, it feeds the male ego, and an insecure male will never marry you." Bitch, ain't you never heard of a sugar-momma? Do you really think, DO YOU REALLY THINK that a man would NOT enjoy having a less-stressful life? Being able to pursue his profession (even *gasp* child-rearing) without the pressure of being the primary breadwinner? Ya think that every female doctor is either married to a CEO or a spinster?

Goddamn you're a fucking cunt Phyllis. And you have been for decades. Were you my horse I would have sent you off to the glue factory a long damn time ago.

Apr/15
2014

A long time ago, and I mean a LONG FUCKING TIME AGO when I was a kid someone told me this joke their dad (supposedly) told them about a bird called a Foo that would peck to death anyone that wiped foo-shit off after being pooped on. There. That's all the intro you get, go infer the rest.

UNITED NATIONS (AP) -- Israel's U.N. ambassador on Monday denounced a U.N. agency head for tacitly comparing the Jewish state to Nazi Germany and has demanded her suspension.[..]

In a speech in late February, Khalaf referred to "Israel's adamancy that it is a Jewish State, which violates the rights of both the Muslim and Christian indigenous populations and revives the concept of state ethnic and religious purity, which caused egregious human suffering during the 20th century."

So let's see now, what are the accusations?

Violates the rights of non-Jews because they are non-Jews? Like taking away their homes, subjecting their reporters to excessive and intrusive searches to do their job, etc. Check.

Concept of state ethnic and religious purity? For example demanding that all marriages be sanctioned by Orthodox clergy? Check.

Causing egregious human suffering by preventing the free flow of commerce, withholding taxes, denying free and open travel to non-Jews? Check. Refusing to negotiate with the people who were displaced when their nation was formed? Double check.

I think the Foo has shat and the shit fits pretty damn well. Cry all you damn like, but Apartheid is alive and well...

Apr/14
2014

And there you have it folks, just what the pro-lifers want to see: what happens abortion is hard to get. I wonder if this makes them happy?

PLEASANT GROVE, Utah (AP) -- Megan Huntsman was clear about what she did with six of her newborn babies.

Huntsman, 39, told police she either strangled or suffocated them immediately after they were born. She wrapped their bodies in a towel or a shirt, put them in plastic bags and then packed them inside boxes in the garage of her home south of Salt Lake City.[..]

Defense attorneys also will try to determine whether Huntsman sought an abortion and if she told anyone about her pregnancies - all in hopes of understanding actions that otherwise appear incomprehensible, Parnham said.

Abortion? In Utah? Oh please. Yeah, that's so easy for a woman to get, with no negative stigma, no backlash, and of course it's free of charge. Funny huh? Like dead baby funny.

This woman felt she couldn't manage having more children in her life, nor could she manage admitting she was pregnant and then giving the babies up for adoption. So she did the one thing left to her, she murdered them. Which is so much better than abortion right? Because those cute, innocent, bouncy babies were born alive which is all a pro-lifer cares about. The minute baby is out of mom WHO THE FUCK CARES RIGHT?

Personally I'd like to see one dead baby sent to a pro-life organization so they can see what happens after an unwanted baby is born. It might make them think a little as to which is the better of two evils.

Apr/14
2014

All cellphones offer several options to indicate an incoming call. From the discrete vibrate, to a ring like we typically attribute to land lines, to music and random noises. The music people choose can range from soft and soothing to jazzy and upbeat. As long as it isn't too loud, office mates' phones are seldom overly disruptive.

Then there is my cubie neighbor.

She has her phone "ringtone" set to LOUD. The music is very old school techno (not cool techo, rather it's techo that most older people think makes them hip) followed by an digital voice announcement of who is calling. Every time her phone rings, I jump. I know the names of all the people that call her regularly.

Yes, folks we can all hear your phone ring. Whether it is annoying or not depends on how loud you set it, how much information it audibly offers and how quickly you answer it. You could just put it on vibrate and keep it in your pocket. Or that might be too discrete.

Apr/13
2014

Funny how easy it is to get things like "empowering women to control their ability to reproduce" and "mad one-on-one hardc0re tranny action goatse-style" confused. Because they're like, totally similar things. They both have to do with hard dicks.

UNITED NATIONS (AP) -- Many countries at this week's U.N. population conference are objecting to the idea of enshrining the right of women to make their own sexual decisions, fearing it would tacitly condone same-sex relationships, the U.N. population chief said.[..]

At the Cairo conference, 179 countries recognized for the first time that women have the right to control their reproductive and sexual health and to choose whether to become pregnant. While the conference broke a taboo on discussing sexuality, it stopped short of recognizing that women have the right to control decisions about when they have sex and when they get married.

Many states are trying to include such language in the final document of this week's population conference. Osotimehin said socially conservative countries are resisting the idea, arguing it would implicitly give people the right to enter in same-sex relationships.

So... if women are allowed to control when and if they get pregnant it will lead to men marrying men and women marrying women.

Ok, does anyone reading this not get the fact that conservative countries are run by assholes and incompetents? It's pretty obvious that women being able to decide when to have babies and same-sex relationships aren't all that related. Except, of course, in the way that was mentioned in the opening paragraph. On the other hand you can now see just how repugnant the idea of birth control is to most conservatives AND how they associate repression with being pregnant.

I'm sure it will come as a huge fucking surprise to any readers out there that my position on women's reproductive rights and LBGT relationships are "OF FUCKING COURSE IT'S ABOUT TIME WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU FFS". But it's good to just get that out there. And I'm sure everyone is equally surprised that I loathe and despise assholes who feel that it's their fantasy-god given right to abuse, malign, disenfranchise, hate, and be generally a fucktard toward their fellow human who is just trying to live their own life without interference thank you.

Do I wish that a giant pit would just open up and swallow them all? I'll leave that to you to figure out. But until then let's just manage the separate the issues and tackle them one at a time. In no particular order.

Apr/13
2014

Rand wants the middle class to believe that the GOP is here for them. To do this he believes that his party need a "bold" message. What he omits is that the middle class has already gotten the message from the GOP which is: die you fucking scum.

MANCHESTER, N.H. (AP) -- Potential presidential contender Rand Paul says conservatives need a bold message to "hit those who haven't been listening" and to keep their political movement growing.

The Republican senator from Kentucky tells an audience of conservatives in New Hampshire that the GOP cannot be "the party of fat cats, rich guys and Wall Street."

Paul says conservatives must carry messages of justice, concern for unemployed workers and against government surveillance - if they want to attract new people to the movement, including young people, Hispanics and blacks.

Paul says the conservative movement has never been about rich people or privilege, and that "we are the middle class."

Ok Rand, I'll take you at your word (as unlikely as that seems). If you want to reach out to me and the people around me here are the messages we want to hear:

1. Heavily tax the truly rich who can afford it without blinking
2. Stop spreading this "hurts the small business" bullshit around
3. Never again use the words "religious liberty"
4. Keep government out of women's health decisions
5. Support every person in the US who honestly works for a living
6. Enable people to afford to see a doctor when they need one (not the E.R.)
7. Get the NRA out of Washington
8. Tell CEO's that they could save some jobs if they stopped giving themselves money
9. Support gay marriage
10. Kick the Koch brothers in the nads, both of them

Apr/12
2014

I love how he's now a "hero" for stealing from his fellow citizens. He's nothing more than a dickless asshole who refuses to acknowledge what other law abiding citizens have been doing all along.

The fight between Bundy and the Bureau of Land Management widened into a debate about states' rights and federal land-use policy. The bureau revoked Bundy's grazing rights after he stopped paying grazing fees and disregarded federal court orders to remove his animals. The dispute that ultimately triggered the roundup dates to 1993, when the bureau cited concern for the federally protected tortoise in the region. (AP)

So it's like this "Clive" you're NOT king of America and you're NOT it's only citizen. Federal property belongs to everyone in the federation and the fact that you've been fattening your cattle for free, for the benefit of YOURSELF and your family and NOT the citizens of the USA makes you a grade-A, prime cut of scumbag.

As for the brainless teabuttbaggers, you go man. Acquire all the losers, layabouts and lametards behind your cause with as many guns as you can because sooner or later one of the many inbred will twiddle his trigger finger in the wrong way.

As for whose land this is, it belongs to the nation, not you. You're the bully, one who has chosen not to work with either the state or the federal government since you were first warned two decades ago. You're milking the system for your own profit. You're a greedy, fucking, asshole.

Apr/12
2014

Dan Becker is a special person. He takes misogyny to a whole new level. See in Dan's mind women aren't people with thoughts and feelings, they're vessels for carrying a man's baby. Any man's. At any time. So rape and incest aren't crimes and resulting pregnancies aren't reminders of violence or hate, they're god's justice against women.

The National Right to Life Committee recently voted to cut ties with one of its most zealous state affiliates, Georgia Right to Life. The move, which angered many anti-abortion activists nationwide, came after the affiliate defied instructions to endorse an anti-abortion bill in Congress because it included exceptions for rape and incest.

Georgia Right to Life's president, Dan Becker, described the March 29 ouster as "a tragedy" but said his group would stick by its 14-year-old policy of consistently opposing exceptions for rape and incest. "GRTL will stand true to its mission and not be swayed by the prevailing political winds," Becker said.(AP)

Dan is so far afield that even the most conservative anti-abortion organization has told him and his group to get lost rather like the Westboro Baptist bozo's who are so out there that no one wants to associate with them. It's frightening that such people can be out there, but the comfort is that MOST people, even those who want to stop abortion, understand that there are common limits that both sides can agree on. A woman who was forced to become pregnant against her will isn't a "god given miracle", it's a crime.

The center says many of the rape victims in armed conflicts are minors, with bodies not developed enough to safely bear children. Without the option of safe, legal abortion, says the center, these victims face a high risk of death from illegal abortion, suicide or childbearing.

So Dan, you hateful turd, here's hoping that your next turn on this planet comes as a woman in a third world country, a victim of poverty, crime, disease, and war. Here's hoping that your reincarnation brings about some poignant revelations that ALL people are created equal and are deserving of the right to determine their future.

Alternatively I can also hope you're born to such a woman so you can experience the misery you want to visit on women. Either will do.

Apr/12
2014

Utah Attorney General Sean says that calling gays "sinners and sodomites" isn't about hate, it's about the "natural and wholesome" way conservatives see the world...

SALT LAKE CITY (AP) -- Utah Attorney General Sean Reyes said Friday during a rally of gay marriage opponents that his defense of the state's same-sex marriage ban in a federal appeals court is not motivated by hate.[..]

"I can assure you, we are not motivated by hate, we are not targeting out of animus or any sinister motives particular individuals or families in Utah," said Reyes, who has been in office four months.[..]

The Utah rally was put on to show gay marriage opponents are still out there and don't intend to give up. Speakers said marriages between a man and a woman are the only unions that ensure children are raised properly, echoing an argument made by state attorneys to the appeals court.

Mary Summerhayes held up a picture of two gay men with their adopted child, decrying the harm done to children raised without the love of a mother.

Chirley Rodriguez, a mother of six adult children from Lindon, Utah, held a sign that said: "Gay marriage destroys families." Like many, Rodriguez said her religious views drive her beliefs: "Traditional marriage is God's law."

Let's see now, Sean says it's NOT about hate and yet the quotes from his rally were "Gay marriage destroys families" and children are harmed when there's no mother around. Does that mean they get an extra helping of love when it's two moms and no dads? NOT! Because well, Chirley (or is that Churley) can't think that far. To her gay means mandatory buttsex, and not in that chaste, promise-ring, it ain't sex if you're not penetrated vaginally kinda wholesome way (because buttsex between heteros might be icky, but it's still ok).

Sorry where were we? Oh yeah, Sean Reyes and the inability to call a spade a spade.

So let's see, on the one hand Sean says his position trying to disenfranchise people based on the gender of their partner isn't about hate AND the fact that like-minded folks (Chirl and Mary) stating that gays are bad, bad, bad, evil, evil, evil because their happiness ruins theirs and also bad for the chillens.

Sean, let me ask you, are you stupid? Or do you think that your audience is stupid? It's either one or the other because it's pretty plain that the people rallying behind your end of the case aren't just full of hate, they're spewing it like a damaged firehose. It's a veritable hate-parade being held at a hate-party for full-time gaybashing hatemongers.

No matter what you want to call it.

Apr/11
2014

"It's natural and part of Islam, of course we wouldn't want to showcase someone who speaks against it." That's my take on the whole turnaround on Ayaan Hirsi Ali.

BOSTON (AP) -- Brandeis University has transformed an accolade into "a moment of shaming" by withdrawing a plan to give an honorary degree to a Muslim women's advocate who has made comments critical of Islam, she said Wednesday.

The university decided late Tuesday not to honor Somali-born Ayaan Hirsi Ali at the May 18 commencement after receiving complaints from some students, faculty members and others, including an online petition.[..]

Ali said that her critics selectively pick quotes and that she doubts the university was not aware of them.

Ali is not just a survivor of Islamic violence against women she is someone actively campaigning AGAINST the continued injustices that women face under its tyranny. Does anyone with half a brain (one assumes that the students and professors at Brandeis would have at least this) think that someone who suffered and survived genital mutilation would be warm and friendly towards their abusers? Really? Take a second to think about it. If someone lopped off your dick in the name of a particular religion would you be all warm and respectful in return or would you be bitter, angry and want to prevent others from experiencing your pain?

IT'S NOT A HARD QUESTION IS IT?

I'm sorry but the fucking intellectuals at Brandeis are retards. Living in a nice cushy fucking town with brew pubs and ethnic restaurants and their parents money keeping them comfy in their L.L. Bean corduroys it's pretty hard for them to fathom or identify with life in the third world for a woman. But what they can get angry about is when someone stands up and slams religion because that's politically correct.

So here's a fat middle finger to Brandeis. Like Ali even needed a piece of paper from your little University in Nowhere Mass? Yeah no. But I'm sure you'll go far. Make sure you put your achievement in denouncing a crusader for women's health, safety and welfare on top of your resume. It'll help you go far.

Apr/10
2014

You gotta love the whole bipolar attitude towards women. It's all kissy, kissy when they want the votes and once they get them it's "Back in the kitchen Bitch."

WASHINGTON (AP) -- Republicans blocked a Senate bill Wednesday aimed at narrowing the pay gap between men and women, an election-year ritual that Democrats hope will help spur women to back them in this fall's congressional elections.

GOP lawmakers said the measure could hinder employers from granting raises, or permitting flexible hours in exchange for lower pay, for fear of costly lawsuits.

Hinder employers from what exactly? Oh right from maintaining transparency? The main point of the bill was to prevent harm being done to workers who share information about their pay. This means that if two people willingly exchange their salary rates, bonuses, etc. they would not get sued. The Repubs called this 'frivolous' and defended the right of employers to sue employees who share their information.

Basically the GOP doesn't want Sally to know that she's being paid less for the same work that Ben is doing. If Ben divulges that information he could be out on his ass.

NICE WORK FUCKING DICKBAG REPUBLICANS, NICE WORK.

And of course the excuses as to why women should still get paid 77 cents to a man's dollar came thick, fast and lame.

Sen. Angus King, I-Maine, who usually aligns with Democrats, voted with the GOP. He said later the bill ignored the real reasons for the pay gap between genders, such as companies that make it hard for women with children to continue working.

I'm sorry what? What the FUCK does child care have to do with it? The real reason women get paid less is because COMPANIES PAY THEM LESS. Is that really so hard to follow? The real reason the bill wasn't even brought to the floor for dick-sucking, er, discussion was because republicans had to prevent news clips of their anti-woman attitudes fueling democratic campaigns.

Hey GOP. You suck dick, you know that?

Apr/09
2014

But you shore can with 3 K's. Take it away boys!

NEW LENOX, Ill., April 4 (UPI) -- If Ku Klux Klan members can?t get along, there?s not much hope for the rest of us?

A beef has arisen between two Illinois KKK groups about whether one of the organizations is actually being led by a ?white? man.

Robert Jones, the Imperial Klaliff of the Loyal White Knights, doesn?t think the Traditionalist American Knights are legitimate because he believes their leader, Ancona, is Jewish.

"This guy?s group, the Traditionalist American Knights, ain?t even been around three years," Jones said of Ancona.

The Traditionalist American Knights recently distributed literature in New Lenox.

"Frank Ancona is also Jewish and his wife is Jewish and he?s being exposed all through the Klan world as a fake and he ain?t even white and you can actually look his family tree up which we?ve got his family tree which we can give y'all too and you can post it,? Jones told the New Lenox Patch.

"It says that Ancona is a nonwhite name, it's a traditional Jewish name, Italian, and his wife, the Klan is supposed to be a Christian organization and his wife actually practices the Wiccan religion, which is basically devil worshipping to me where you?re worshipping any God besides God himself. I just thought I?d let y'all know that."

Ancona denied that he was Jewish and called the Loyal White Knights and Jones a bunch of "drunks and druggies."

"If I was a Jew, I'd admit it," Ancona. ?We don't want their white trash Hoosier types. Apparently their messing around with alcohol has destroyed their last few remaining brain cells."

What's to add? I'll bet we could make some good money settin' these boys up with some bats and a kiddie pool filled with puddin' (banana of course). Yeeehaw!

Apr/09
2014

Yeah I love it when Stay At Home Mommie takes the high-n-mighty to her working peer: "well I clearly love my family more..." No actually, you're just stupider.

NEW YORK (AP) -- The rising cost of child care is among likely reasons for a rise in the number of women staying home full-time with their children, according to a new Pew Research Center report released Tuesday.[..]

No matter what their marital status, mothers at home are younger and less educated than working counterparts, the report said.

The truth? You can't handle the truth. Go watch your fucking soaps and wipe up after junior mmm'kay? You have leave the heavy-lifting to your smarter and more mature sisters.

And I used to wonder what woman in her right mind would vote conservative. Now I know who and why. Jealously doesn't suit you, ladies, but that's probably all you have left.

Apr/08
2014

Hey John, you're an asshole you know that?

CONCORD, N.H. (AP) -- A veteran New Hampshire judge has retired and been reprimanded after he made comments believed to disparage female lawyers.

The New Hampshire Judicial Conduct Committee formally reprimanded John Lewis in a decision released last week. The Strafford County judge had retired in September following a complaint that he said the legal profession is being diminished because more women are becoming lawyers.[..]

Among the comments the commission said he made:

-In Russia, people don't respect doctors because medicine is seen as dominated by women and he sees the same thing happening with the legal profession in the United States;

-People respect leaders in the male-dominated business world;

-More women lawyers hurts education because fewer women are becoming teachers.

Yep more red-state goodness here. Apparently John is more than a LITTLE bit intimidated by the women who are scaring him because, you know, they're everywhere. Like Jason or Freddy Kruger.

The quiet clack-clack of a stacked heel tapped out a secret message as the woman walked down the corridor. 'I'll bet she's wearing a suit. A suit! The nerve,' he thought as his trembling hand reached for a cigarette. No! He threw it aside as if it were a viper about to strike. Gone were those days, gone. John stifled a sob on the arm of his pinstriped gray flannel. His eyes grew round and big as his mind drifted back in time to the days when men filled his office and his life. The tender baritones as they presented to him, lips moist and trembling, begging to be heard. The barely audible husk of stubble against stiffly starched collars. John broke down like Oscar Pistorius on the stand, the very thought of him made him clench inside.

He knew who was truly to blame here. Women. Gods how he hated them. The clacking by now had faded, but the memory of the tell tale heart continued to haunt him...

Hey John, know what they call men who are scared of women? Pussies.